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Dreaming


Author: Yousef
ASL Info:    26/M/Egypt
Elite Ratio:    8 - 468 /203 /22
Words: 234
Class/Type: Random Thoughts /Serious
Total Views: 1627
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 1327



Description:


Keep on dreaming till one of your dreams comes true!


Dreaming



I've spent most of my life dreaming!
Dreaming of things I can't have,
Things that can't be done,
Things that may never come true,
And things that don't even exist!
I say it's stirring, while others say it's a waste of time

I dreamt of a perfect world
Where there's only peace and love
Where the young respects the old
The strong don't crush the weak
The poor don't steal from the rich
And the rich don't disdain the poor!
But that never happened and may never will!!

I dreamt of a fairy tale
Where two souls meet
And become one
I dreamt of a perfect love
A love from the heart
A love from the soul
That's based on respect and trust
But that never happened and may never will!!

I dreamt of making a difference
And change this earth to heaven
I dreamt that I can,
That I will,
That I did
But that never happened and may never will!!

After all this
You think I'll stop!!

No I won't!
I'll keep dreaming…until one of my dreams comes true!

Yousef Hani




Submitted on 2005-05-07 05:49:27     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  What a BOLD write...no need to counteract your DREAM...A very FEISTY piece I tell you. I appreciate how you articulated your points without being apologetic for what you want to evantuate..This is an excellent write for those who want to make a difference and are probably afraid to embark on that journey.Though there may be obstacles, but becuase its an innate desire you have to be very focused...Wish more people could dream like you...I know I strongly aspire to have this dream.I enjoyed its element of firmness..This was such an excellent and courageously stimulating piece...I loved the harmony aswell...Most enjoyed...Be happy!Nobantu
| Posted on 2005-09-01 00:00:00 | by Nobantu | [ Reply to This ]
  Dreaming of a perfect world... ah, I can't even think of how many times when I had the same thoughts. This was an impeccable poem. I could feel your passion of a better/fantasy type world through your linguistic form. People that have dreams in their lives, and stick to them, are the people that will go far in their life. They tend to be a lot more content with themselves. I like that in a person. One who pursues their dreams, and is always persistent in everything that they do. Thanks for the good read. :)

-Segniust
| Posted on 2005-06-26 00:00:00 | by Segniust | [ Reply to This ]
  Hi there how are you? I thought why not take a if my friend has posted some new piece and there you are. I think I have told you once before, that I admire your faith and that what I see here. I love this piece it reminds me of my autobiography, which I started writing but wrote only one or two pages. The first page was something like this. It is about me being dreamer. Now to your poem the fact which I like about your poem is that you don't regret being a dreamer, You love your dreams although you know they are just dreams. I wish I could have been like you.
In the first stanza you tell say what you have dreamt of. In the second stanza you specify it by telling us what you have dreamt of. First a peaceful world. In the third stanza you tell us about the fairytale ( I love the imagery you have created here ). In the fourth stanza you talk about more serious subjects like making differences. The last few lines sum everything up. I can only say a very beautiful piece I really did enjoy it.
This is my favourite stanza

I dreamt of a fairy tale
Where two souls meet
And become one
I dreamt of a perfect love
A love from the heart
A love from the soul
That's based on respect and trust
But that never happened and may never will!

Well done I hope was able to help you with my comment.
With love shabnam
| Posted on 2005-05-10 00:00:00 | by shabnam | [ Reply to This ]
  I really like this. It has humour, hope and a sort of good naturedness underneath it all.

Most importantly although you acknowledge that these dreams may never happen (which has humour, through those exclamation marks :) you will still keep dreaming and trying to turn it into a reality.

it's very interesting. Usually people who lament about dreams not being able to come true, they end the poem with a 'woe is me' sort of thing, ;) but you managed to be a realist and a dreamer at the same time, which is inspiring!

'I say it's stirring, while others say it's a waste of time' I think maybe something better could replace the 'waste of time' maybe just drop the 'of time'? Just a suggestion. :)

I like the second stanza very much, especially with reference to the poor AND the rich, but I feel the line 'disdain the poor' the word disdain isn't suitable, maybe 'don't look down on'?

I like how each stanza starts with a hopeful and beautiful line,

'I dreamt of a perfect world'
'I dreamt of a fairytale'
'I dreamt of making a difference'
Really beautiful.

You think I'll stop!
This line is very funny, how about
You'd think I'd stop! ;)

All in all, a very hopeful, optimistic and funny read. Thanks. Looking forward to reading more. :)
| Posted on 2005-05-08 00:00:00 | by pennyroyal tea | [ Reply to This ]
  hmm. i have dreamed of things i would want to do but wouldnt be able to because of things in my way which i cant block. but i liked your words. shows some good in people.

i dreamt of a perfect world

i wish. in dreams anything can happen which the beauty of it. nice to see another one your stuff. lovely.

-soomie
| Posted on 2005-05-07 00:00:00 | by poeticblindness | [ Reply to This ]
  Autobiographical?

These are wonderful thoughts and images.

I think you could tighten it a bit, but give it time to evolve.

My suggestion is in line two. Try replacing dreaming here with another word like envisioning. I think it might read smoother.

Any poem that speaks the words your heart wants it to say is a great poem.

I like the heart that wrote this one.

Dream On!
| Posted on 2005-05-07 00:00:00 | by beatthedrum | [ Reply to This ]
  You've commented on my work in the past, so I've been waiting for a new submission to reciprocate the favour...here goes.

Firstly, two spelling errors and a grammar one:
'The strong don't crush the week (weak)
The poor don't steel from the rich' (steal)

and 'But that never happened and may never will! (should be 'but that never happened and may never do' or something along those lines).

This was slightly unusual in that although it appeared to be one of those 'feel good' poems it also had a touch of dark humour with the repetition of 'But that never happened and may never will!'. Additionally, you used a lot of exclamation marks, which gave an almost humorous feel to some of the piece.

I'm not sure exactly what to think of this, it was either a tongue-in-cheek satire or a piece celebrating unfounded optimism. Either way, it was original in its execution and an interesting read.
| Posted on 2005-05-07 00:00:00 | by Civilian | [ Reply to This ]
  always keep on dreaming...
one of my FAVOURITE parts of the movie "pretty woman" is the start and the end when the rasta looking dude walks round shouting out loud to everyone and no one all at the same time "whats your dream...everyones gotta have a dream..." always keep dreaming...
persistance is the key...
and i am a firm believer that anyone can make a difference in the world... i am sure of it... mother theresa, when asked how she was gonna change the world, said something along the lines of 'by helping one person at a time' and i think yeah... too true.
anyways yeah... keep dreaming... get your head in the clouds... the veiw can be breath taking from up there and life can be seen with greater clarity and more positive...
| Posted on 2005-05-07 00:00:00 | by Someones Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]


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