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Hopeless Romantic


Author: RJCHANDLER
ASL Info:    30/F*GA
Elite Ratio:    3.53 - 44 /68 /23
Words: 85
Class/Type: Poetry /Love
Total Views: 1068
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 598



Description:


To Brett, Somany Miles away from me, yet, here beside me , everywhere I go.


Hopeless Romantic



You say the things
I have longed to hear
whispering sweet promises
Sounding sincere.

I want to believe
what you say is real
you’re touching me
your breath I feel.

My heart is melting
your voice is hypnotic
every piece of you
to me, is erotic.

I am losing this battle
my defenses you shatter
the wall crumbles down
but it doesn’t matter.

A hopeless romantic
will always give in
It’s pointless to fight it
Love will always win.




Submitted on 2005-05-08 08:45:42     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  Well, that was somehow really really interesting! I really am not sure whether I have read any of your poems before or not! I think I didn't! But I think after reading this one I'll try to read more of your poems at least to judge better.

And now about the poem itself; I think that this is a beautiful poem indeed, of course the subject of the poem isn't new BUT The way it was presented was good and simple too (in my point of view), the poem is well written with nearly no spelling mistakes and that is a very important thing because I believe that spelling mistakes take alot from the beauty of any poem.

And I must talk about the title ( Hopeless Romantic ), which was very very well chosen and captures the attention of the readers (it captured mine)! Actually I chose to read this poem because of it's title! And also the description which I believe to be a very important tool for the writer to use to capture the attention of the readers and to give a prior presentation to the poem and I think you somhehow succeeded in doing that as you used it in a simple and sincere way!

I think that the emotion was flowing all over the poem and the sincerity too! And that is a very important thing, as I believe that the key to the succes of any poem is how sincere is it and how was it presented to the reader and did it touch him in a way or another! Because that is what poetry is all about! It is all about translating our emotions in to words.

I liked the part that says

"I am losing this battle
my defenses you shatter
the wall crumbles down
but it doesn’t matter."

And also the last stanza "The finale" which was very good and well written too, saying;

"A hopeless romantic
will always give in
It’s pointless to fight it
Love will always win."

I agree with "pennyroyal tea ", saying; it will be much better without "sweet"!

I think you succeeded in transfering your emotion through the poem to the reader and let them feel what you feel and that is a very good thing.

Anyway I hope that my comment was somehow helpful to you and I'll end up my comment saying Good luck and keep it up.