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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Saturn Spacedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: beatthedrum
    ASL Info:    55- F - Southern CA USA
    Elite Ratio:    4.18 - 881/810/122
    Words: 105
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 1716
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 579



    Description:
       Being in Saturn is an ancient euphemism for melancholy.

    Thomas Moore's book Care of the Soul covers this in some depth if the concept is of interest to you.

    The meaning of this poem is intentionally veiled.

    The central metaphor of the piece is using shadows to add depth to an image (me).

    The premise is that I appreciate dark space (depression) for the dimension it adds to life. While I don't want to spend a lot of time there, life would seem less rich without the contrast.

    The life that I am making is the landscape of love. The picture is my life. In some mystical sense I am pulled into the picture I make. The shadows are what keep it from being just a flat image.

    The last line is tied to the first. "Picture" refers to an image of life as being a painting or drawing. "Drawn" in the last line refers to both being pulled and making an image. It can be read either way, each with a different meaning.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSaturn Spacedots
    -------------------------------------------


    I picture a dark place that gives me comfort
    in its absence of stimulation, substance and color.
    It is my Saturn space.
    I take refuge in its solitude and silence.

    It is not the place I care to live.
    Still, I enjoy the visits.
    This space is mine alone,
    my alone box.

    I break off a piece of this charcoal.
    It is essential in my palette.
    My pictures are broad, full of color,
    but there is no depth without the shadows.

    I am drawn deep into the landscape of love.




    Submitted on 2005-05-08 13:55:21     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Dear friend thank you for the heads up... great minds really do think alike... I enjoyed every bit of this poem because, as you know, it touches me personally, deeply... and it was these lines that i thought were particularly creative...

    I break off a piece of this charcoal.
    It is essential in my palette.

    The world is your pallete of art and the shadows are your charcoal... haha i wish i would have thought of that for my poem... I love that i have a like mind on this site... usually, like you said, it's just a big mesh of depression and pessimism... and that's why i right... to give a different view of the world... it's great to know i got a companion in my quest... take care my friend...

    Travis
    | Posted on 2005-07-16 00:00:00 | by Mwa Ha Ha Ha Ha | [ Reply to This ]
      ok...[censored]...I'm speechless

    this is so deep and terse and packed full of...wisdom? truth?

    there is no depth without the shadows

    damn...that line alone could spark hours of conversation...and I love the idea of an "alone box"

    I must check you out more closely!
    | Posted on 2005-05-31 00:00:00 | by deadndreaming | [ Reply to This ]
      I had not related the idea of Saturn as means of evolving, but this is interesting. The idea that we visit the darkness as a superb solitude rings true with me.
    And that we pull more and more light into our souls as we evolve. Few want to look at themselves this closely, I admire the quest to do inner work. And love is all of it in so many ways. I think the spelling on palette is two t's. Very nice, I'll be back soon.
    peace and love,
    Nan
    | Posted on 2005-05-09 00:00:00 | by nansofast | [ Reply to This ]
      This is very interesting and thought provoking. As someone who suffers from depression, this really inspired me. You have a wonderful way of putting ideas to words, which is shown in this poem. it seems to go against the 'norm' of what it means to be content, with the very first stanza,

    'I picture a dark place that gives me comfort
    in its absence of stimulation, substance and color..' in another poem this would seem very depressing and gothic like, and yet here it seems very peaceful, this 'dark place' is more of a resting place it seemed like..

    The alliteration with stimulation and substance is effective, in contrasting general life with this 'saturn space.'

    'I enjoy the visits'. This is an interesting view point. Many people hate the feeling of melancholy. Yet this poem indicates that sometimes it may help a person grow..

    Just one thing about the second stanza,

    "This space is mine alone,
    my alone box. "
    maybe another word to substitute for alone as its repeated twice. mine only? I like the idea of the 'alone box' though. Normally this would claustrophobic, and panicky, but you manage to show through this that sometimes being alone, gives depth to the 'landscape of love'

    Pallet-I think thats supposed to be palete. :)

    'But there is no depth without the shadows.
    ' I love this line. It speaks for itself.

    The concluding line is very effective, and I think relates very well to the poem. I like the pun also. :) For all the colour, and darkness that makes this 'picture', you are 'drawn' into this 'landscape', both by your passion for it, and by living it, you are etched into being a part of this 'picture'...

    Thanks for the inspiring read.
    Another favourite for me.
    | Posted on 2005-05-08 00:00:00 | by pennyroyal tea | [ Reply to This ]
      WOW. that is interesting to think about. i never thought of my alone place like saturn. but why do you say in the last line i am drawn deep into the landscape of love? i thought this poem was about your privacy and your alone time? that was just striking to me that you would add that part at the end. me personally, i dont see the connection. but thats me. holla back. yours truely----gothichik1
    | Posted on 2005-05-08 00:00:00 | by gothichik1 | [ Reply to This ]


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    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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