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    dots Submission Name: the bulletdots

    Author: DanceADream
    ASL Info:    16 f canada
    Elite Ratio:    5.05 - 205/153/29
    Words: 68
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 930
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 439

       hey...we all know the feeling. this time it struck me hard.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsthe bulletdots

    The day the bullet struck my heart
    Was the day it all went down.

    The day the bullet struck my heart
    Was the day I knew I'd only be a walking shell of who i used to be.

    The day the bullet struck my heart
    Was the day I knew I'd never love again.

    Submitted on 2005-05-08 19:29:38     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Yes, @ 14 you will find that this feeling may come several times.
    Kissing your cousin...did she know you had these feelings 2? I don't know who I'd be more peeved at.
    Good job expressing your feelings and just say his loss & move on girl! Love,Peace,Joy!
    | Posted on 2005-05-09 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
      Aww thats so sad. Perfect description though. And yeah, of course I know the feeling...its just too bad that its not a good one. But I suppose these things happen. Anyways, this was very nicely done. I like it a lot. Great job :-)

    | Posted on 2005-05-08 00:00:00 | by Liv2LoveThePain | [ Reply to This ]
      How many times and how many ways can one express the pain and sadness of losing love? I guess the ways are enumerable for you have found another and it is very well written. Using the bullet as a concept was quite creative. Being fourteen I think you could make one change, 2nd line last stanza:

    Was the day I knew I may never love again.

    Take it from a older guy, your going to love a few times before it's all over. Diamond Dan
    | Posted on 2005-05-08 00:00:00 | by dmm | [ Reply to This ]
      Yeah, I liked it. Nice style you wrote this in, and you certainly don't have to think about it, the message bashes you over the head.
    Could have been a bit longer even, although it's hard hitting the length it is now.
    Well done,
    Be Happy
    | Posted on 2005-05-08 00:00:00 | by wewak11 | [ Reply to This ]

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