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    dots Submission Name: feast of blooddots

    Author: theman
    ASL Info:    21/m/mn
    Elite Ratio:    3.52 - 496/478/149
    Words: 203
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Death
    Total Views: 789
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1222

       I was wacthing the first blade then i wrote this. a vampire thing.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsfeast of blooddots

    Its the feast of the blood was in
    Unleash the beast within
    I walk around with the strength of 100 men
    You besta run before I count to ten
    Blood dripping from my k9 like a fountain pen
    It seems that Iíve been asleep for 1000 years
    The way my world has changed it bring me 1000 tears
    Prince of darkness that walks through the rays of light
    To this beat of empire of the portal type
    The shape shifter mirror image flash photo type
    The ever lastin in digital red blato type

    Try to do as my name thatís fatal
    Tried to claim my fame but thatís fatal
    About to bring the pain thatís fatal
    Bite through your jugular vain thatís fatal

    I strike back with a vengeance
    The father of decedents
    And I cant be deflected by your silver cross pendants
    Blow the holy water you make the false images
    Must wait for the signal ahhhh your life diminishes
    Sing like the scorpion
    Strike with the force of ten
    My blood is going to revitalize the corpse of men
    And the last thing the said theyíd never walk again
    The bride dipped in the dark will talk again

    Submitted on 2005-05-10 08:28:32     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      i liked this poem alot well writtin and has great flow to it. and over all five out of five for you and going to add it to my faves
    | Posted on 2006-01-15 00:00:00 | by EV2884 | [ Reply to This ]
      wow that is tottally better than anything i have ever written yeah there were a few mistakes but thats cool they are small ones and easy to fix but i think you are really good and your only 15 don't stop writting okay I want to read more by you! pan
    | Posted on 2005-06-28 00:00:00 | by pandora22 | [ Reply to This ]
      Awesome I wish I could write long poems
    as well as this one
    some words need attention gut I cant spell
    so I am not one to talk
    | Posted on 2005-05-10 00:00:00 | by acapone | [ Reply to This ]
      that was awesome, i think its my favorite of all your work (though the others are amazing as well). i like how it told a story and it kept my full attention the whole way through. it kept me wanting more...again. lol anyway good job and I hope to read more of your work soon.

    Karen (kp_2007)
    | Posted on 2005-05-10 00:00:00 | by kp_2007 | [ Reply to This ]
      sweet that's awesome, i love poems and storys and vampires or creatures like vamps. but there are a few spelling errors like besta-better? "it bring me"-it brings me other then those it it all right my fav. lines are "The shape shifter mirror image flash photo type
    The ever lastin in digital red blato type" i don't know but they are cool.
    | Posted on 2005-05-10 00:00:00 | by Fadingperson | [ Reply to This ]
      I'm not quite sure about this piece. I think there were just too many typos for it to make sense. There were some lines that had my muse perked then a jumbled word was thrown in and instead of me saying "Okay there IS a point." I sat here thinking "huh"? did he mean they? their? the? huh?
    | Posted on 2005-05-10 00:00:00 | by Brownsdelight | [ Reply to This ]
      i think this was ok. it seemed a little vague in its symbolism but the wording was great. i would give it a 3. nice work
    | Posted on 2005-05-10 00:00:00 | by Sun | [ Reply to This ]
      hey I like it it sends a very stong image of darkness and light it also sense the imagination
    wild this is very good a very philosophic view
    | Posted on 2005-05-10 00:00:00 | by littlepoet | [ Reply to This ]

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