[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Piano Key Poetrydots

    Author: Emma_closes
    Elite Ratio:    4.28 - 88/111/44
    Words: 136
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1159
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 886

       You'd probably need a musical background to pick up a lot of the word-play in this, but I think the meaning is clear enough. I had fun writing this, a lot of fun, working these terms into sentences where I could build from them. Things like "sharp sign", "slur", "tie", "natural sign", and things like that were all musical phrases.
    Let me know what you think, this was sort of a branching out experience for me.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsPiano Key Poetrydots

    That note you wrote me, months ago
    Still screams at forte in my ears
    It causes me to slur my voice
    Until it is legato
    Because you cut the chords;
    But if I had a choice
    I'd whisper in piano
    As I wrote you in return.
    I'd tie us back together
    And twist back incomplete measures
    I'm not sure how I'd shape the phrase
    But there wouldn't be a doubt
    That it would be a natural sign
    That would lead us to crescendo
    Out of this diminuendo.
    You never meant to lose your tempo
    It was simply a sharp sign
    Of another bad momento.
    I know we'd move ritardando
    As I'd play you the piano
    Just like we were before
    I'd smile ivory
    And we'd read poetry
    And play out how it used to be

    Submitted on 2005-05-11 17:57:47     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Well done. I always like the blending of different mediums. I especially like a few of your turns of phrase:

    "But if I had a choice
    I'd whisper in piano"

    "I'd tie us back together
    And twist back incomplete measures"

    "I'd smile ivory
    And we'd read poetry
    And play out how it used to be"

    Really a gem of a poem here. Beautiful. Relating your relationship to music. Such possibility.
    later, kc
    | Posted on 2005-07-03 00:00:00 | by twacky | [ Reply to This ]
      All righty! I like to consider myself a musician, although that might be an insult to all those musicians with a considerable amount of talent out there....but that's besides the point. The point is, I recognize the terminology and thought you used it quite cleverly! This is going to be a favorite, just so ya know! I'm a music addict, and so how you used the music related words was especially delicious from my take on it.... "That note you wrote me...." Well I take it as of course, a handwritten letter (note) but then of course, a note as in an F or a G or perhaps a note in ones voice which is just unfinished music, really. I think you did well with your 'branching out' and I hope you continue to branch out with Poet-TREE HAHAHA oki bad joke...but strangely enough a new poem that will be hitting the shelves of elite soon.... so I must conclude myself with a NICE JOB! Hope to read more, honestly!

    | Posted on 2005-05-11 00:00:00 | by LucyDiamond | [ Reply to This ]
      First of all, ur musical terminlogy is spot on. Do music at school and everything you've written is just so right for all u pianists out there (im a guitarist, kno pizzicato, legato, staccato, only in fingerpicking style, its my best :p)

    "Out of this diminuendo.
    You never meant to lose your tempo"

    This i gather, is out of this disaster - diminuendo, u used a musical word to describe 'disaster' a piece of work u tried to compose, that went wrong and you never meant to lose ur tempo - speed antics? but tempo as in temper?? no. you remind me of a 4 year taught pianist in my music class, however, she may possess the role of a pianist but i doubt she cud write a piece of poetry as wella as u can.

    I'd smile ivory
    And we'd read poetry
    And play out how it used to be

    When i read these lines, and the whole, I am admiring your poetry skills and how you can link ur musical talent into your writing skills. Its a hard thing to do, but u my friend have accomplished your mission, [censored] hell yeah, ur intelligent mate, keep writing!
    | Posted on 2005-05-11 00:00:00 | by freak_like_me | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Break Up written by WriteSomething
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    To written by SavedDragon
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    To Glow written by krs3332003
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    Push written by JanePlane
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Bond written by saartha
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    Incubus written by monad
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Wavelength written by saartha
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    One Thing written by Wolfwatching




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]