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    dots Submission Name: descend.dots

    Author: wilted_
    ASL Info:    20/f/singapore
    Elite Ratio:    5.22 - 138/110/29
    Words: 92
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 914
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 732

       a piece I wrote quite a while ago and rediscovering it now, I guess it took on a different meaning to me.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    the stranger dwells within -
    bleak and unwelcomed,
    yet uncannily endearing to the spirit.
    the flaw in all known perfections
    marrs us so.

    silent and undaunting
    the silhouette entails truth as it
    creeps back into reality,
    seizing what it desires -
    harping on negative vibes of

    bright lights flashing
    but the dark's beckoning.
    drawn into the syndromes of the night.
    overwhelming, unbearable

    of a long forgotten path -
    once ventured,
    now abandoned.

    running away not from
    the monsters,
    but the angels.


    Submitted on 2005-05-15 21:26:31     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Your vocabulary is quite impressive. You use words I haven't even heard for many years. Words like "marrs"...

    very impressed by this poem
    | Posted on 2005-12-23 00:00:00 | by Senna27NZ | [ Reply to This ]
      your wording is just amazing, i loved this poem. it has alot of emotion and meaning.. it was just great.

    the stranger dwells within -
    bleak and unwelcomed,
    yet uncannly endearing to the spirit.
    the flaw in all known perfections
    marrs us so.

    your very talented..
    | Posted on 2005-05-22 00:00:00 | by joy7542 | [ Reply to This ]
      You have an exceptionally good wordchoice and imagery going on in the first three stanzas. The image of the silhouette streaming almost ghost-like into the darker corners of the soul. Your term "syndromes of the night" is also well thought out and so apt of a discription.
    It's strange to say that you take us on a pleasant descent into dark emotion, but it's true. You allow the reader to slowly sink into it rather than jerking them down.
    Overall this is a very nicely done piece. You've given eloquent discriptions to such raw emotion.
    | Posted on 2005-05-17 00:00:00 | by jaycee | [ Reply to This ]

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