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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: River of Endless Dreamsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: LadyChaos
    ASL Info:    19/F/DE
    Elite Ratio:    3.42 - 718/606/95
    Words: 78
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 857
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 502



    Description:
       Reminding myself that I was a poet once....realizing how much the site has changed since I began posting almost 3 years ago...


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsRiver of Endless Dreamsdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Swim along with me,
    In this stream of lovely dreams.
    The water's warm hands
    Will gently caress our skin,
    With the sensual sense of a lovers touch
    Pleasure and rapture will seem commonplace
    And dull, in the embrace of the slipper water.

    Time will cease to exist.

    And we can live an eternity in a moment.
    So, swim along with me
    In this river of endles dreams
    Where all we have do to is....
    Breathe.




    Submitted on 2005-05-18 01:54:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      it did have a sensual feel to it. ... I liked teh way you personified the water. I did not understand ..."slipper water..."
    | Posted on 2005-05-18 00:00:00 | by isis_lenore | [ Reply to This ]
      I would have to agree with everything that has already been said... very sensual and a very nice read... i am going to add this to my favs.. i would make suggestions but there isnt anything that i can see which should be improved..well done..
    | Posted on 2005-05-18 00:00:00 | by stormyskies | [ Reply to This ]
      Very nice and great to have a old poet back in this site :) I loved the flow and easy imagery it represents.

    "In this river of endles dreams
    Where all we have do to is...
    Breathe."..it has such a calming effect.
    | Posted on 2005-05-18 00:00:00 | by vedanta19 | [ Reply to This ]
      Nice style that flows smooth with every line. This poem moved effortlessly from my mouth and had a great Sensual feel to it.
    | Posted on 2005-05-18 00:00:00 | by childs | [ Reply to This ]
      ok lets dive into this one, I really love it when people use water in poetry maybe because water is one of the most basic elements to sustain life. In the pyramid of needs it has the number two spot, air being one and food being three. I disagree almost with a fervor with the previous view that breathe should be replaced with caress it takes away from the point of the poem, breathing is a pointed fundamental of life itself further tying itself to love. may I borrow a quote "a life without love is not worth living" This has gripped me like your pieces usually do. I like your symbolic language dont change a thing. sincerely mike :)
    | Posted on 2005-06-19 00:00:00 | by inspirit999 | [ Reply to This ]
      we can live eternity in a moment= reminds me so much of Blake;) i liked this poem from theway it felt so relaxing and, yes, there is something sensual in its slow rythm and calming tone.

    cheers

    neon
    | Posted on 2005-05-18 00:00:00 | by neonlights | [ Reply to This ]


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