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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: lori-tab (take me away)dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: bleeding-soul
    ASL Info:    17/m/al
    Elite Ratio:    4.22 - 94/94/14
    Words: 115
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Love
    Total Views: 889
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 715



    Description:
       I want true thoughts on this. My inspiration for this is, of course, the pill and a person. I hope many people can relate.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotslori-tab (take me away)dots
    -------------------------------------------


    I need you to take my pain away
    How the pain hurts so much
    Numb my body and mind
    Take me away

    Take away the painful memories
    Keep me out of the cold
    Save me from the hate of mankind
    Take me away

    Numb my soul and absent mind
    I want to leave this cruel world for a while
    Fuck me over
    Take me away

    I want to fligh high
    And never touch back down
    And stay far from sober
    Take me away

    Wine and liqour
    May help some
    But you get me through
    Take me away

    Without you
    Your magical remedy
    What would I do?
    Take me away




    Submitted on 2005-05-18 12:58:45     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      wow :)
    | Posted on 2011-11-16 00:00:00 | by lori_tab | [ Reply to This ]
      Not my favorite.

    More rhyming could be brought in, not too bad, but I like rhymes. You use too many original words here, let your imagination go, it's so plain.

    Don't worry, I have more than a few terrible ones in my collection, but also really good ones, like you do.

    necrotic
    | Posted on 2006-04-28 00:00:00 | by necrotic | [ Reply to This ]
      i hate everything about your stupid [censored] opstimistic bull[censored] site.[censored] this goddamn website.Is THIS a good [censored] comment
    | Posted on 2005-05-23 00:00:00 | by Vincent Knives | [ Reply to This ]
      i thought it was pretty good...far from original though because of huey lewis and the news singing "i need a new drug"...i feel like taking a pill right now to get me comfortably numb...
    thanks...

    pestiferous
    | Posted on 2005-05-21 00:00:00 | by pestiferous | [ Reply to This ]
      i liked the whole concept of it but it didnt rhyme much and it was sort of choppy but i liked it when you said..."I want to fligh high and never touch back down and stay far from sober take me away"that part rocked...i liked it overall.
    | Posted on 2005-05-18 00:00:00 | by intoxicated411 | [ Reply to This ]


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