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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The Wall Tells the Storydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: cuddledumplin
    ASL Info:    36/ f/UK
    Elite Ratio:    4.08 - 6269/5927/526
    Words: 40
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 715
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 252



    Description:
       I wrote some more today, but this seems like the best thing I've written since my hiatus. This is inspired by this photo http://www.artnet.com/artwork/169127/shoichi-akatsu-notepaper-on-wall-15.html I took liberties because it's a dent and not a stain (though it looks more like a leaf or butterfly to me now), and the paper isn't pristine. I suppose I like push pins better than tape too (if only for their alliterative name). I just realized that the walls of my home library/ office are almost the same as the one in the pic; i justh thought it was a weid coincidence.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Wall Tells the Storydots
    -------------------------------------------


    A perfect piece of blank lined paper
    (not a spot, not a tear, not a crease)
    is push pinned to a battered wall
    (pockmarked, scarred)
    beside a locust-shaped stain.
    The wall is my soul:
    the paper my mind.




    Submitted on 2005-05-18 16:27:37     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    ||| Comments |||
      Sparse, but so potent, as is all of your poetry I have read. Not the sort of verse that I especially favor, but there are plenty that do. I suspect that you may earn your living as a writer of some sort. I suspect that your prose is even better. bravo.... michael
    | Posted on 2007-04-05 00:00:00 | by Algol46 | [ Reply to This ]
      I had to check out the pic and now I'm not sure if it is the pic that makes the poem so powerful or the other way around, or both. Probably both.

    What is curious about this is that it can be taken in so many ways. The first image, your mind as a perfect piece of blank paper, can be taken to mean that your mind is blank, empty...you are at peace - or it could be taken as I first saw it, as a mind always ready to start over fresh when a new idea strikes, ready to absorb your next masterpiece.

    The second image, the stained soul, is very poignant. A pure soul is something we would all like to think we have, but do any of us? The stain from the locust is symbolic and could mean many different things. The thought that comes to me on this is the insect stains we get on our windshields so it makes me think of your soul racing through life, absorbing the impact of all the crap that flies at you. You clean up the damage inflicted on your soul, but stains remain.

    So we're left with an open mind against a damaged soul and this is a testament to the strength of character that we all must have to keep from becoming bitter, especially important for those that create like yourself. I'm sure I'm miles from what you intended, but that is the beauty of this piece. A simple surface (like a blank piece of paper) but so much going on underneath...wise, creative and inspirational
    | Posted on 2005-05-26 00:00:00 | by deadndreaming | [ Reply to This ]
      i like how you made such a powerful point with something so simple. Your wording was perfect for this piece and brought perfect harmony to the wholeness of it making it all the better. great job-
    jenn
    | Posted on 2005-05-22 00:00:00 | by joy7542 | [ Reply to This ]
      i really like the simplicity of this! this is amazing!

    i love it when you are inspired by the most random things to someone else and to you it is so dear!

    nice

    -Nikki
    | Posted on 2005-05-19 00:00:00 | by ThaCrib | [ Reply to This ]
      The wall is my soul.
    The paper is my mind.

    This is well done Amy, I like these two ideas. I can't help thinking the wall is somewhat stable. But the paper's presence symbolizes something that can't be forgotten. And then the actual depth and of two two serves as a good analogy two. Your writes always make me think, I like that! Great job,
    Hugs,
    Nan
    | Posted on 2005-05-19 00:00:00 | by nansofast | [ Reply to This ]
      very cool juxtaposition of the pure white uncrinkled unmarked paper and the stained and faded wall... the mind and the soul. i do agree that it is delicate. it's nice to see your mind cogitating Amy, always!
    !Cat
    | Posted on 2005-05-18 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow, so short and simple yet it says so much. Beautifully written. Its almost delicate, if you know what I mean. This is such a elequent and simple piece. Excellent job.
    | Posted on 2005-05-18 00:00:00 | by rockunsilenced | [ Reply to This ]
      You know what! I just had an idea for a different format! I usually don't have big bursts of ideas but this one just hit me. I really like this and that's why I don't know why I have a suggestion for it but I can tell ya! ;) hehe
    Here goes,

    A perfect piece of blank lined paper
    (not a spot, not a tear,
    not a crease)
    Is push pinned to a battered wall
    (pockmarked,
    scarred)
    Decorated with a locust-shaped stain.
    The wall is my soul
    (the paper is my mind).

    I hope that makes sense. I think the format and words are great already I just had to suggest it once it hit me! :) I love the idea of a perfectly lined piece of paper clean, just for your mind. :) And the soul that is so torn and tattered. Interesting concept. Great job! :) I'm happy you are getting into the groove of writing again.
    :)
    -blt
    | Posted on 2005-05-18 00:00:00 | by borderlinetears | [ Reply to This ]
      Great metaphors. I really like this one. There aren't many with a theme so simple yet so "full"(for lack of a better term) Good write. I'm surprised no one has commented but then again not many comments going out lately that I've seen. Wouldn't change a thing and this is most definately going on my favorites.

    Blessed Be!
    | Posted on 2005-05-18 00:00:00 | by Sarah Leger | [ Reply to This ]
      Ooooh..i like. The second time i read this i was left wondering if there was some possible way to wittle it down even further. It was engaging in that way.

    Your poems are like logic problems. If this equals that and that is not this then what are you left with? Hmmm...will definitely read more.
    see you later, kc
    | Posted on 2005-06-15 00:00:00 | by twacky | [ Reply to This ]


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