Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Silent Herodots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: onetruesmartass
    ASL Info:    30/F/Wa
    Elite Ratio:    4.01 - 934/791/77
    Words: 216
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 1120
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1425



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSilent Herodots
    -------------------------------------------


    We buried a hero this morning
    It was cold and gray
    The wind ripped thru us
    On this sad day.

    Lots of people
    Mostly old men
    Stood proudly in old uniforms,
    To say goodbye to a friend.

    He didn't talk alot
    So alot we didn't know.
    He refused to speak of Korea,
    Never let the horrors show.

    We found out he was different,
    Once a long time ago.
    Back when he was young,
    And couldn't wait to go.

    Three medals of Bronze,
    Two of Honor.
    He helped save countless lives,
    And pushed the weak farther.

    MIA, feared POW
    They couldn't find him.
    It took less than a year
    Thanks to the loyalty of his men.

    Now, this brave hero
    Is not the man I knew.
    He was goofy and silly
    And taught me to tie my shoes.

    A history buff
    He loved the past.
    Lots of pictures and letters
    So old they had yellowed fast.

    Absent minded in his older years
    But thats to be expected.
    Slower towards the end,
    Before he knew his heart was infected.

    I hope we did him justice.
    I hope we did him right.
    This silent hero
    Who was willing to fight.

    Goodbye Uncle Ted.
    I love you





    Submitted on 2005-05-18 18:46:08     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Good write. The flow was well done and the emotion conveyed could be sensed. You orchestrated the direction of this piece very well. You have inspired me to write a soldier piece. Nice job.
    | Posted on 2005-05-24 00:00:00 | by Malcolm Bishop | [ Reply to This ]
      Thank you very much for sharing this. much respect and admiration for you and your family. this reminds me of conformity against individuality. it can be heart-breaking to see what one man was before he went to protect us. the service changes so many in soo many ways but saves all of us in so many ways and i thank every single one of the human beings for making my life better.
    L.O.
    | Posted on 2005-05-19 00:00:00 | by lone_one | [ Reply to This ]
      This was so touching! The way you spelled through at the beginning was a distracting though. This was really good though! I love the way you changed directiond in it
    | Posted on 2005-05-18 00:00:00 | by Kitty | [ Reply to This ]
      Crap! Just when I think you may have run out of creative ideas, you floor me with another heart-wrenching poem.

    I love the fact that you let your work come fromt he heart. Forget meter, and let the story shine on it's own.

    For someone who calims they hated poetry- hehehe, had to tell- you sure are good at it.

    I'm so glad I can call you friend.
    Chell
    | Posted on 2005-05-18 00:00:00 | by Chell | [ Reply to This ]
      i loved this poem it was so sad and filled with love...congrats on the great write that will probably touch peoples hearts!great job!
    | Posted on 2005-05-18 00:00:00 | by intoxicated411 | [ Reply to This ]
      Just beautiful, Traci. I love how you went from the old men at his funeral to how you thought of him...he wasn't a war hero to you, he wasn't the one in Korea to you...he was uncle Ted. It was very touching, and I'm very sorry for your loss babydoll. Hope to see you tonight
    ~Rachel~
    | Posted on 2005-05-18 00:00:00 | by nebnim | [ Reply to This ]
      This was really sweet. I loved the whole thing and think this is also a really good poem. I loved the way you made this flow and the words you used in it. Hope you keep on writing and posting.
    | Posted on 2005-05-18 00:00:00 | by Akili | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    59479

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry