Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • ES Magazine
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • Video Tutorials
  • RolePlay
  • 90% off Amazon
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: scratch me like a recorddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: BenevolantWords
    ASL Info:    16.F.NJ
    Elite Ratio:    3.04 - 100/93/28
    Words: 210
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 357
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1398



    Description:
       ex-boyfriends can be such a .........


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsscratch me like a recorddots
    -------------------------------------------


    Scratch me like a record
    Distort my lovely sound
    but when you play me backwards
    Secret messeges are found,

    "It's not because I hate you,
    And it's not because I care.
    It's because the changing phase you went through...
    I had to be there".

    So scratch me like a record
    and take my mental state
    turn them into lyrics
    To decide my deadly fate.

    It was you who cried when we broke up,
    Begging me to stay
    and out of spite, you use these lies
    Saying I was "play".

    As you scratch me like a record,
    You start to draw some blood.
    A little bit more everyday
    Till I become a flood.

    Scratch me like a record
    See what makes me scream.
    You say you're not pretending,
    but it's just another scheme.

    So as you scratch me like a record
    and distort that lovely sound,
    I'm planning to reverse my needle
    just to bring you down.

    Cause of all the time you wasted,
    Scratching me insane,
    I have found a way to cause you,
    Exactly as much pain.

    So keep on scratching me until,
    my words cannot be said,
    Cause now I have the confidence to scratch you till you're dead.....




    Submitted on 2005-05-19 19:47:22     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I mostly agree with Samuel, I too was expecting some kind of sappy lost love [censored]. But yours was very original, and I like that. Good job!
    ~Kat
    | Posted on 2005-05-19 00:00:00 | by MorbidAngel114 | [ Reply to This ]
      I read the description, and I was like...FU<K! not another sappy poem about a lost love...blah blah. I almost didn't read it. But I did. I was dran in to your talent like it was a magnet. I loved this poem, I love the Personification, and the metaphoric state of the poem. This poem took my breath away. I especially like the 1st and 5th stanzas. I really enjoyed reading this. Are all your poems this outstanding? And I also loved the rhyme scheme to...Bravo...SAM
    | Posted on 2005-05-19 00:00:00 | by Samuel Bielz | [ Reply to This ]
      This is very good.very good use of words and the poem has great imegery.The flow was great. I like the way use used the recrod as main repeating theme. i woulndn't change a thing. my fave line/stanza was

    "Scratch me like a record
    Distort my lovely sound
    but when you play me backwords
    Secret messeges are found,"

    well hope to hear from you.
    | Posted on 2005-05-19 00:00:00 | by seven11 | [ Reply to This ]
      This was really good. I liked it and the style of it. There was a spelling mistake I noticed, but other than that I have nothing bad to say about it. I liked your choice of metaphor. Sometimes repetition doesn't work, but with this it added to the emotion and impact. Good job!

    ~Delirium
    | Posted on 2005-06-01 00:00:00 | by Delirium | [ Reply to This ]



    Full Anime Episodes Streaming Free
    5 million youtube videos all rated over 4.7 stars with 40+ ratings

    [ Copy this | Start New | Full Size ]

    Google
     

    [ Chrispian ] [ Write Forum ]
    [ Friends ] [ SNESroms ] .
    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry
    This user has been inactive for more than 5 days.