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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: A title not earneddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: shombray
    ASL Info:    18/F/Texas
    Elite Ratio:    5.31 - 103/91/26
    Words: 185
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 771
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1014



    Description:
       I want people to know that strippers get raped too and cops mostly blow them off because they are strippers .It is a shame and it is sad.No I am not a stripper.I just used first person point of view in the poem.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsA title not earneddots
    -------------------------------------------


    I do have a job to attend to
    That sometimes I don't like to do
    Instead of putting on a suit I wear lingere
    I work on cool nights instead of bright sunny days
    Most workers sit in cubicles or try to stand all day
    But I strip dance and slide on silver poles if I may
    I do not help my customers my customers help me
    I do get paid like everyone else except every night Iget money in my panies
    I do this because I want to go to college
    And pertain a whole lot of knowledge
    I am a single mother who has another mouth to feed
    My child has to have food, clothes and other needs
    Yes I am a stripper

    Idid not spread my legs for his dollars
    Instead I was forced to feel pain and hollar
    It was not sensual it was not fun
    He threatened me that he would use his gun
    Officer please open your eyes and see
    That this man has brutally raped me
    Because I am a stripper





    Submitted on 2005-05-23 06:45:57     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Um. . . the content was a bit iffy by me, but putting that aside, it was good in style and format. The title, I'm not sure it quite fits, sorry if I'm really negative today (it's not a good one
    | Posted on 2005-05-23 00:00:00 | by orange | [ Reply to This ]
      wow, this was really good. the only thing that i didn't really like about it was that at the end of every stanza you said, "yes, i am a stripper" and then "because i am a stripper". it made the poem less interesting to read, and it seemed repetitive. i think that it would have been better if you only used those lines once, maybe in the 6th stanza, and the last stanza. other than that, it was a good write. keep it up, and good luck to you.
    ~kriss
    | Posted on 2005-05-23 00:00:00 | by juss_kriss | [ Reply to This ]
      nicely said about your job! I like how you lead on in the beginning and then shock us by your profession! I like it and how it flows and how poet you can make your job, nice way to pull it off, keep up the good work peace & stay safe...
    | Posted on 2005-05-23 00:00:00 | by Cordell | [ Reply to This ]
      I like this because it has a message and it tells a story, and I love a good story. I think you just inspired me to do a stripper piece. Take care.
    | Posted on 2005-06-03 00:00:00 | by Malcolm Bishop | [ Reply to This ]


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