Well the metaphors and wording is absolutly beaitiful and i love the imagry, but you seem to be a little pharagraph happy, you put in returns a little to often, i think it would flow better and be easyer to read if you condensed some of the lines, but over all i liked it a lot, my favorite part was on the distant right, digressing from the beaten track, your route meanders abruptly to the left and back - THe rest of the stansa could use a little work but i liked it all the same! ~Shadow P.s thank you for reading "the path to individuality"! Your advice is always welcome. (your pic is awsome!)
This was very dark. I don't know if it sounds political or more of a battle with another and an inner battle within yourself?! Maybe I'm wrong? I don't know. Other then the confusion of what the meaning is...this was really interesting!