Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: I want to get awaydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: theman
    ASL Info:    21/m/mn
    Elite Ratio:    3.52 - 496/478/149
    Words: 106
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Depressed
    Total Views: 687
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 636



    Description:
       I used line from lenny kravitz

    "Oh....I want to get away
    I want to fly away!"

    so just to tell u before you read it


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsI want to get awaydots
    -------------------------------------------


    I wish that I could fly
    Into the night sky
    So very high
    and not come down from this cloud
    Just like a dragonfly

    I'd fly above the greenest trees
    Over the bluest seas in all differnet degrees
    To anywhere I please

    Oh....I want to get away
    O so far away
    I want to fly away

    I wish I could fly away
    From the all pain
    Away from all these stains
    That I left behind with that knife
    That knife that tried to take my life.

    Oh....I want to get away
    O so far away
    I want to fly away!




    Submitted on 2005-05-25 17:28:29     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      it has a good message, but some parts seem kind of random. I really liked the idea of it, but it kind of flowed and was kind of random. I don't know, maybe it's just me...
    | Posted on 2005-05-25 00:00:00 | by salamander | [ Reply to This ]
      I love it, the flow is good there are no spelling errors, and yes we all want to get away from our life once and a while but in the end we like things just the way it is, because once you start something that you like you won't stop and then that becomes your life so no matter how hard you try you return to it, and for you it's a knife(not good but that's your choice I'm not going to yell at you like i could because i've done it to a few of my friends so feel really lucky) But there is a lot of the feeling of want escape coming through this poem and my fav. lines are
    "I wish I could fly away
    From the all pain
    Away from all these stains
    That I left behind with that knife
    That knife that tried to take my life"
    just because it tells what you want to do and why.
    ~liz~
    | Posted on 2005-05-26 00:00:00 | by Fadingperson | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    60425

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Birds of a Feather written by poetotoe
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    The Poems Death written by Mepoduo
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Shi written by ShyOne
    Angel Eyes written by poetotoe
    untitled written by ShyOne
    Still Perfectly Flawed written by armand
    Etiquette written by saartha
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (5) written by endlessgame23
    Carry written by saartha
    The Old Mill written by Wolfwatching
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (1) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Life is moments written by Ramneet
    Suffer The Children written by poetotoe

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry