Description: Any type of feedback is good, because either way it will inhance my skills. I've put my self in every one of these postions and in them there is always sometime where confusion is in the air. Whether it was a split second or ten minutes, or even longer. The fact of the matter is that confusion, it has happened, it will continue to happen. Now, this is the end... how do you feel? Do you understand, or do you not; or is it confusion? Oh and yes I do plan on reading others work today and commenting. This is my first submission.
when you have so much thought running through your head, anything impartial is confusing.. the format was unorthodox but there is nothing wrong with being different that i can promise you.. for your first poem posted, you did rather well... i enjoy a good question piece, i sometimes like to think when im reading.. sometimes.. lol great write.. keep going with your own style
Theres quite a bit of "confusion" here... :) haha, at least I can crack myself up, now personally, this type of repitition annoys the hell out of me... even though the whole impartial thoughts, confusion, drug abuse, memory loss, heartache, no heart, etc. rings truth in my own life, it still annoys the hell out of me. But hey, if you love it and there are other people out there that love it, go for it man! Sarah
Original thinking here, and that is all important when it comes to writing. Creative in it's take on life. Keep it up, always seek new ways to get thoughts across.
Very nice...My only thought on is maybe when you say 'or is it just confusion' start the next line as a new stanza...break it up a bit... Other than that, this is awesome... I like how you contrast and all that good stuff..
Nice poem...oh...by the way...I felt really apreciated with the comments you wrote me...and I felt like you really understood me and I think that is beautiful. This poem is really great, as well as the others...keep it up...I look forward to reading all of the rest!And I mean it...so write buddy. This makes you think...grat peom...you have skill.
very cool poem. I like how the repeaters fit in, but somethings don't really seem to match the whole "confusion" theme or it is really supposed to be like that? or is it confusion? just joshing. Good write, maybe revise the part about the heartache...
allrighty mike this is a good starting piece. confusion is one those those things that take you for a spin huh? sometimes the wrong impressions can set it off. you have to have an image in your head of what kind of things happen to you, put in events..maybe a situation that leave you confused. perhaps it could be misinformation that could have thrown into confusion or maybe misunderstanding. maybe alcohol or drugs but describe in greater detail what, who, where, how, and why. of course the why is a little harder it is for everything almost. what launches the state of confusion? and if you can remember what you were doing in it? that would be swell too. also how do you pull out of it?? and while you you werre the state of confusion did you miss anything? and later did you found out what you missed?? where the emotions involved such as anger, disappointment, melancholy, fear. usually fear of some sort is usually accompanied by confusion. did that state cause any problems with people around you? these are just a few suggestions. i hope i helped you. mike
Submission Name: Confusion
