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Author: Mia
ASL Info:    17/F/MD
Elite Ratio:    2.99 - 103 /123 /52
Words: 114
Class/Type: Poetry /Friendship
Total Views: 1078
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 838


This is pretty raw and deep, may be hard to understand. Kinda how I feel about my friends ditching me and constantly telling their lil secrets all the time...


Not told
Are just like lies

You keep them
I ask you
"Nothing." is the reply

Come on now
I know now
That's just another lie

Can't stand it
Sick of it
Don't even deny

I know it
I see you
And your newfound friends

Your secrets
Your trust
In me is gone

What happened
What did I do?
I just don't see

You trusted
I promised
And never broke it

But somehow
I screwed up
And all the trust is gone

I ask you
You wont tell
Yet another lie

You see here
The lacking
Is tearing us apart

Submitted on 2005-05-27 23:01:45     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  wow! this is deep and i totally love it, i also do have some 'problems' similar to those with my friends, so i can totally relate to this poem, there is not much to say, i really liked it, there was a realy good rhythm to it, i loved it gooooood job, is going to my faves!!! awsome
| Posted on 2005-05-28 00:00:00 | by anita_89 | [ Reply to This ]
  i think one lesson we all learn is that friends come and go. Its always hard to deal with at the time but sometimes you got to let them go and maybe its for the best. i angree with shombray. to me it seems as if there is a lack of emotions in this poem, it is really good and what you have can be worked on and become a great piece if you just add that litlle more
| Posted on 2005-05-28 00:00:00 | by Natie | [ Reply to This ]
  I completely agree with shombray.

You need people who can make a healthy difference to your space :)

You do not need friends who are fickleminded.
| Posted on 2005-05-28 00:00:00 | by vedanta19 | [ Reply to This ]
  Your poem can be understood but it needs more rhythm because eveything sounds good, but it is going every where.I am not trying to give you mean criticism because my poems are not perfect either.I am not good at rhyming.Friends are like seasons.They come and go.You don't need them.They need you because if they did not need you then they would not be holding back things from you.For the most stupidest reasons they are jealous of you because you have something that they wish they could have.It could be that you are smarter,or you are liked more.It could be anything.I know.I have been through this before.Keep your head up and don't let them see you down about this because if they do, then they know that they have gotten to you.
| Posted on 2005-05-28 00:00:00 | by shombray | [ Reply to This ]

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