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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: March of Eternitydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: BloodBaptism
    ASL Info:    18/M/TX
    Elite Ratio:    2.8 - 17/18/4
    Words: 103
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 985
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 626



    Description:
       This is for my fellow American Soldiers who are fighting in IRAQ and AFGHANISTAN as we speak...


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMarch of Eternitydots
    -------------------------------------------


    On and on we move towards hell
    black and white all know it well
    pain throughout our beaten souls
    walk on feet torn with holes
    making our way towards the end
    we march on through our lives defend
    tattered clothes and beaten boots
    we fight to defend our American roots
    toward eternity we march
    on and on to the blackened arch
    adversary far and wide
    fear becomes what courage cant hide
    death is part of life of course
    but you cant take me off my horse
    over seas we march on through
    we fight and kill to protect you




    Submitted on 2005-05-30 14:37:32     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I really respect your dedication and attention to our soldiers. This piece, along with your other are very fine tributes to these freedom fighters.

    Bravo!
    Love,Peace,Joy!
    | Posted on 2005-05-31 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
      Good Job baptist, you are getting there.
    Thanks for the comment on
    "Darkness after Death"
    I was really tired when I wrote it , but it turned out pretty nice
    And I would have to agree, poems don't need a rhyme scheme to be good
    Big Bill-
    (If you get a chance come to my page and check out the ones where I used a rhyme scheme :P )
    | Posted on 2005-05-31 00:00:00 | by Big_Bill789 | [ Reply to This ]
      I love it. Anyone who dedicates poems and writings to soldiers are number 1 in my book. Lol. I really enjoyed reading this. I think that you have great insight on this, GJ.
    | Posted on 2005-05-30 00:00:00 | by Blindly-N-Love | [ Reply to This ]
      Nice. A few grammatical errors, but otherwise, a very cool flow. Nothing bad to say about this poem here. Keep up the good work.
    | Posted on 2005-05-30 00:00:00 | by Yclipse | [ Reply to This ]
      i really liked this and i got the feeling that you really captured their thoughts in this work. i liked the flow and the rhyme didn't seem forced to me. I like this theme to, it's a good one to write about. The only thing i would sugest is to use punctuation. A few commas and periods and this peom could hit a whole new level. Kepp it up! :)
    *Samy*
    | Posted on 2005-05-30 00:00:00 | by samyalone | [ Reply to This ]
      I love this, I am really patriotic when it comes to the war and our men fighting over there, I really don't like it, I mean, if you think about it, they are marching as machines not men, and it drives me crazy, I hate the war, why not peace, why can't these nations be at rest. I know alot of people in the war, I feel what you feel. EXCELLENT WORK!
    Vicious :)
    | Posted on 2005-06-01 00:00:00 | by ViCiOuSWrItEr | [ Reply to This ]
      I see you said "fellow" American soldiers, so I guess you're one too, which makes your words here even more poignant.
    The rest of us can only imagine, and be thankful that you're there.

    Well done

    be happy

    Graeme
    | Posted on 2005-06-02 00:00:00 | by wewak11 | [ Reply to This ]


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    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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