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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The Glendots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Ari Leukos
    ASL Info:    17/Male/CA
    Elite Ratio:    4.92 - 92/129/44
    Words: 196
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 295
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1768



    Description:
       A poem about a special place I found one day...


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Glendots
    -------------------------------------------


    Tucked away, wrapped in green
    Where traces of amber light whisper
    And wary gusts of nature's breath
    Whisk the leaves and trees in turn;
    Where only I can see the sacred beauty
    Of this veiled glen

         We take another step through the grasses
         "We're almost there," I whisper
         I hold your hand
         Above, the thunder crashes

    Cradled amidst the towering firs
    Shielded from balmy days abroad
    This alcove in the tranquil wood
    Liberates the artist's soul,
    Dispels the cynic's scornful eye
    Inspires a modest prayer
    (I'll go there, now and then,
    To that hallowed, veiled glen)

         We push away branches before our path
         "Look inside, and see," I speak
         You laugh, unsure
         Rain falls; we've come at last

    Locked inside a cherished thought
    In memory- imagination now reality
    Boughs sweep on low to the earth
    That knew my step, touch, and tears;
    And one day I'll share this place
    For all it's worth
    To one who might see the sacred beauty
    Of my veiled glen

         We step inside, the noise dims down
         We are silent, here, lost in serenity
         We smile with our eyes; here
         Light shines, and is found




    Submitted on 2005-06-01 22:07:56     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This is simply beautiful
    This write created a beautiful and LASTING vision in my mind
    I too as a youth had these same spots where I could go to just release some negativity and become one with nature again
    I must say I found this to be one of the most beautiful writes I have read here on Elite and I have read thousands
    Fantastic Job
    God Bless
    Ron
    I am definately a fan of your work!!!
    | Posted on 2006-07-06 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      I completely agree with mcgovern_xiii. You truly are an artist, Ari, and I really don’t see any other work that quite matches up to the quality of yours. Everyone has, or at least likes to have, places that are special to them, and better yet, special places that no one else knows about. Gives it a bit of a Secret Garden feel, if you ask me. Very mysterious, romantic, and wonderful, all at the same darn’ed time.

    “And one day I'll share this place
    For all it's worth
    To one who might see the sacred beauty”

    Isn’t it most dissapointing when things that we’re fond of, cherish, or enjoy, aren’t loved in the same way by those we love? A very, very dissapointing thing I’ve found it to be.

    Anyway... Just great how you can take this “tucked away, wrapped in green” place and make it seem so very much a part of a supposed paradise itself. And, maybe it is. You seem to emphasize ‘veiled glen’, which makes me wonder...perhaps a clue to the exact wherabouts of this place. Even a clue to something else? Or maybe...I’m overanalyzing, again.

    The stanzas in between where your special place is shared with a special someone give this piece of art a much more personal feel, as though we really are being shown ‘The Glen’ instead of just being told about it. Five stars, and I might just have to tuck this one into my bag of special delights, and add it to my favorites as well. All in a days work, I suppose, Ari. Swell job!

    Peace,
    Lucy
    | Posted on 2005-07-04 00:00:00 | by LucyDiamond | [ Reply to This ]
      Any place that can Liberate the artist's soul and Dispel the cynic's scornful eye Is surely a place for me. Thank you for sharing this discovery I hope to see more of your work. Your words painted on the empty canvas of my mind, you truly are an artist and I have to say that it is refreshing to see a poem of this quality from some one so young. Alas, there is yet hope for the future.
    Thanks again for your words
    Terence McGovern
    | Posted on 2005-06-01 00:00:00 | by mcgovern_xiii | [ Reply to This ]
      There's hope for ES yet! With poets like you, perhaps this website has a chance to redeem itself when it comes to quality over quantity. Indeed, this poem is a diamond among a pile of charred rubble. And, please, don't think that praise comes lightly from me. If you'll read most of the other comments from me, you'll see that I can be a total ass and, on majority, am one. The mood of your poem overwhelms the reader, the imagery is vivid described and the poem itself reeks with serenity. One can picture the veiled glen. If for nothing else, this piece made my return to ES worthwhile.
    | Posted on 2005-06-02 00:00:00 | by alexianx | [ Reply to This ]


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