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    dots Submission Name: Bountiful Naturedots

    Author: Ramneet
    ASL Info:    33/F/Boston
    Elite Ratio:    3 - 265/107/53
    Words: 119
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 933
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 820

       I am looking for real critical analysis of my poems so that i can improve my skills.In this poem whatever i have written are my real deep felt feelings about God,man and life.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBountiful Naturedots

    Under the aegis of bountiful nature and
    prudent creator,
    there is blithe, gaiety and joy.
    Balmy breeze, snow on the mountains, burgeon
    of flowers, chirping of birds, murmuring of
    the brook, beauty of sunrise and sunset.
    All creation of the Divine.

    Man-The greatest creation of the Divine.
    His special messenger.
    Benediction of Almighty.
    Originates from Him and merges into Him.
    Soul, a part of Him.
    He prevails everywhere, everydeed and in
    every soul.
    Man comes and goes.
    Changes its role, changes its form.
    Becomes a part of universe for a short span.
    Soul departs from the body, life ends and
    new life advents.

    It will persist as eternal aphorism.

    Submitted on 2005-06-06 16:05:14     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This is a lovely and soulful poem, celebrating the Almighty. We are created in his image, and strive all of our lives to understand and do his will; our breath is drawn from his breath, but we exist as imperfect beings striving to attain the perfection and glory of our creator, who is perfect and infinite!

    Nice work!
    | Posted on 2011-03-24 00:00:00 | by Ron Cole | [ Reply to This ]
      Study usage of the article. I promise you, this is a very good friendly word of advice. Another one? Ok: 'advent' is a noun. A noun can be used as if it were a verb, and a verb can be used as a noun. Sometimes this sounds good; but sometimes it doesn't because the switch is too unusual, and so disturbs the reader! I noticed your use of 'advents' as a verb and found it too unusual for my taste. That does not mean that it is incorrect; but it means that if you want to, you can find a lot more to worry about if you keep on trying to learn more about English! I do not know whether to recommend that, or not. English works fine whether one knows it deeply or not; perhaps the only function for the Eglish of scholars is to keep it all together in one language, which allows us to understand each other in a worldwide language. And you are already a poet, so that scholars need to study you, rather than vice versa ...
    | Posted on 2007-01-15 00:00:00 | by Glen Bowman | [ Reply to This ]
      Very Beautifully said
    I couldnt agree with you more
    I have a strong belief In God and I know he is real
    He has saved me from a life of hell and given me all the happiness I now have to share
    The Lords Love is a beautiful thing
    I only wish I could show others more how beautiful life is with Him in your Life
    I really liked this
    I will be looking for more of your writes
    God Bless
    | Posted on 2006-04-22 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      This was hard for me to read, It seemed to me choppy without any kind of rhythm Or at least I could not find it. In my opinion if you are not going to rhyme you need to catch the reader in another way. it could be me and a bios I have about the subject matter and in that sense it was hard to catch my attention from the start. This may be more prose than poetry. I see that you are new to the site and I welcome you, it is always good to see new writers and I hope that my brutal honesty does not discourage you. I will be looking forward to see more writing from you.
    Terence McGovern
    | Posted on 2005-06-06 00:00:00 | by mcgovern_xiii | [ Reply to This ]

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