A Long Journey by Ramneet

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Submission Name: A Long Journey dots

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Author:	Ramneet
ASL Info:	33/F/Boston
Elite Ratio:	2.96 - 269/107/54
Words:	77

Class/Type:	Poetry/Misc
Total Views:	984
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	497

Description:
I am looking for true critical analysis of my poem.

A Long Journey dots

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An enigma haunted me, kept me thinking and searching.
You, a part of every innocent smile, pure thinking, authentic feelings and immaculate love.
You are the light of every soul, heart of mankind, noble deeds, benevolence, fidelity, veracity and serenity.
Oh! Almighty God, Adroit Creator of Nature and our sole custodian.
You are so close to us.
An intimate part of us, our mind and body.
I am so delighted, I have discovered you.

Submitted on 2005-06-06 16:10:33 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
  We are imperfect beings created in his own image, and driven with his spirit which is perfect....
| Posted on 2011-04-02 00:00:00 | by Ron Cole | [ Reply to This ]
  Wow. It's really nice to see someone express thier personal relationship with the Lord in such a beautiful way. I really enjoyed this read.
| Posted on 2009-02-11 00:00:00 | by JustAnotherMe | [ Reply to This ]
  This was both a fervent prayer and a beautiful acknowledgement of God. It was concise and filled with meaning and depth.

Excellent.

Greg
| Posted on 2007-04-30 00:00:00 | by The Gadfly | [ Reply to This ]
  This is really beautiful
You said truth with every word of this write
There is nothing more beautiful then a personal relationship with God
I try to let others understand how beautifuk this relationship is with every one of my writes
You expressed his love perfectly
Excellent Job
God Bless
Your Friend
Ron
| Posted on 2006-04-21 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
  I like this poem a lot. It shows the love and respect one has for God. It lead me to think this person may not have been a believer at one point but something life changing changed their views. To me this is a very clear poem to read, nothing leaves me questioning or lost. Overall this is a very good piece and I enjoyed reading it. Keep up the good work! :)

~Cris
| Posted on 2006-07-12 00:00:00 | by my_worst_fear85 | [ Reply to This ]
  I thought th@ was good of u. Its hard 4 ppl 2 appreciate th@ peice b/c of their faiths, but I never thought of making a poem about God... & I'm a 14 yr old sunday school teacher.. Why didn't I think of th@..hm.. anyways, the only thing 2 work on is ur flow.. u use such wonderful words, but they seemed rlly forced at times. Work on th@. Read CILA & other stuff 4rm me if u wanna.. thanx ttyl ciao 4 now
| Posted on 2005-06-06 00:00:00 | by Aprie Chick | [ Reply to This ]

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Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3 It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
It means a lot to them, as it does to you.