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    dots Submission Name: meltingdots

    Author: fallingingreen
    ASL Info:    18/f/missouri
    Elite Ratio:    3.56 - 136/141/34
    Words: 974
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1373
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 6160


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    watch me fill this blank page
    as i twirl my pen through my fingers and over my bruised knuckles
    like a baronet.
    watch me make the world fly.
    the light will catch on my hair,
    wrapping it in red,
    that tint it always turns when pigments unfold.
    my eyes are emerald,
    the color of the cheap t-shirt you're wearing.
    it's the one i like best.
    blank like the page was before i began to write a story
    a story about a story.
    not one full of dream-like love
    or red-ribbon-lacing-your-wrists kind of pain
    just a simple story
    and all of the possibilities within.

    you will lock the door and sit before me
    with your feet crossed at the ankles
    your waxy lips will turn up
    in that melting kind of smile
    and i'll begin to write
    that story you've been waiting for
    just words across a page
    not knowing what to unfold
    just letting them come
    and letting them go.
    kind of like those ideas you get when you're a kid
    something as simple as a lemonade stand on the street corner
    you only make a dollar or two
    but when you're only ten
    it seems like a million.
    i remember when i was in junior high
    i was called "speed racer"
    cause i was fastest at the skating rink
    my blades were my wings.
    but that's all over now,
    ever since they shut that place down.

    you will shift your weight
    and ask me how it's coming,
    and i will tell you,
    it would kill you if you knew.
    our eyes will meet for a moment
    as if we were the only two people in existance.
    another moment where time will stop.
    and i will find myself captivated
    by your melting kind of style.
    sort of how i felt when
    i saw the sun set for the very first time
    i saw it reflecting in your eyes.
    the same way i saw the world through my mothers.
    i remember she'd cry to sleep at night,
    wishing my father would come home
    but he was gone forever
    because that's where you go when you die
    you go to forever
    and that's where you stay.

    you will fix your hair
    and worry
    about what shoes you should have worn.
    you always wear your blue sneakers
    because you know i like how they match your eyes
    only they don't shine as brightly.
    you hope for long goodbyes
    just another way to stay for eternity,
    and you know
    i don't believe in goodbyes at all
    so lets just stay here
    in forever
    because that's where you go when you actually feel alive
    and that's where you stay.

    watch me sing under my breath
    my blue jeans hugging me close
    meeting with my pink shirt..
    it's the one you like the best.
    and i will see you start to slip into sleep
    as if you were an angel catching air.
    i will srcibble nonsence the way mom used to tell me to..
    the way the teachers used to hate.
    raw emotion flowing
    just more crap for more eyes to see
    but gold to me.
    your head will fall and then
    you're smile will return
    in that melting kind of way.

    there are parts of me
    dead within
    and that's where i'd like them to stay.
    you'll catch me moving my head
    from side to side
    with the song running through my mind
    the one you wrote the words to
    "i love you"
    better than any fire in the cold.
    better than those ones we'd build on the beach
    six feet high
    and powerful beyond control.
    i would wrap your blanket close to me
    covering my body
    from my toes to my neck.
    "twinkle twinkle little star
    how i wonder what you are
    up above the world so high"
    i'd wish again for something
    that would kill you
    if you knew what it was.

    you will stand
    pushing your arms above your head
    stretching to the ceiling
    to the skies above.
    i will catch you looking over the pedastal
    trying to sneak a glimpse
    of my inky ideas
    popping through my pen.
    and i will whisper
    in that playful kind of way
    "do you want to die?"
    because remember,
    this story would kill you
    if you knew.
    passing time the way i did when i was a kid
    and mom and dad would talk for hours
    in the room with the door closed..
    they weren't making love
    or anything like that
    just talking
    as if they were best friends.
    only, they would kiss more than betty and i.
    and a whole lot more passionate too.
    their words would leave me in awe
    the way you never cease to make me smile
    in that melting kind of way.

    the night will take over us
    eating the time we have together
    i will wish for a pause button
    and use it the way i did when i was eight
    (or somewhere around there)
    and Lion King first came out.
    i stumbled across it
    when my finger slipped
    between play and stop.
    and i used it ever since.
    because i wanted the moments
    to last a lifetime.
    until i learned that
    even moments need to get away.
    so while you sat there
    smiling in that melting kind of way
    i wrote a story
    a story about a story
    with moments that would
    kill you
    if you only knew.
    and i melted away
    into forever
    because that's where you go
    when you lose yourself
    and i was so lost in you
    and that's where i stayed.

    Submitted on 2005-06-06 19:41:17     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      a writer is hired to write words about monarchs.
    he finds himself completely blocked of any kind of creativity.
    he sits and rips, and rips and stands up to rip some more empty pages.
    then he sits and composes himself and writes some words...many many words about the stuggle of writing about monarchs.
    and in these words live tiny stories within even tinier stories...soon there are many stories to be told with a beautiful monarch kicker.
    | Posted on 2005-07-06 00:00:00 | by happy | [ Reply to This ]
      I liked this a lot, because it had so much randomness but somehow it was entirely heartfelt and sincere and I could picture you there writing wishing this never had to end but it does so lets find a way to make it end in forever where we can be, aw man this was awesome, I am adding it to my favorites.

    Take Care,
    | Posted on 2005-06-06 00:00:00 | by UnspokenDreamer | [ Reply to This ]
      It was so long but I didn't mind at all because it was so great! It is very well written, and I love the repetition and slight change of the lines "and that's where you stay" and "in that melting kind of way". I agree with lisa that people may not want to read it because it is so long, but who cares? You wrote it for you, not them. With a sense of nostalgia along with your admiration of the other person, this is a fantastic poem! I really don't know what else to say except that I love it and look forward to reading more from you now. :) Thanks for posting!
    | Posted on 2005-06-07 00:00:00 | by prettybaby | [ Reply to This ]
      Nice write.

    Length seems to creep into all of the comments on anything more than a screenful these days. I wouldn't worry about length overly. This kind of stoey is all about rambling here and there, hither and yon. It's pretty much freeform emotion as well as freeform poetry.

    | Posted on 2005-06-08 00:00:00 | by Lost Sheep | [ Reply to This ]
      I really enjoyed reading this "story". I loved how you mixed the past and present to make it flow together. You created excellent visuals with colors and expressions.

    You turned random thoughts and emotions into a story about love. You were writing for you, not to impress, which is something that a writer sometimes forgets to do. You let the reader get to know a little bit about you, in this.

    This was nice. Please keep writing, for yourself, and let us read it.

    Brightest Blessings
    P.S I didn't think it was too long, it was just right.
    | Posted on 2005-06-09 00:00:00 | by lenotoire | [ Reply to This ]
      wow, first let me give you a standing ovation, this was totally awesome, I love the Alfred Hitchcock feel to it, to many it may seem random maddnes,but actually it a well crafted haunt love tale mixing in all the fears of loving a person and how you feel if they ever left you. People are very foolish not to read this story, I am going to add this to my fav.
    | Posted on 2005-06-28 00:00:00 | by edthepoet | [ Reply to This ]

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