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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Whats the dealdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Anchiale
    ASL Info:    32/F/AL
    Elite Ratio:    3.56 - 88/73/14
    Words: 158
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 1094
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1060



    Description:
       I wrote this for my papi, so that he would know how I feel about him from now on, lol.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWhats the dealdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I'm asking questions
    I want answered, yet I feel ashamed.
    I'm so tired of the game...
    we always talk, but our emotions we never explain.

    I'll be the first on the MIC,
    let me tell you my innermost thoughts.
    You are like my sun,
    the light I can't do without.
    Like water to farmer's crops,
    you're most important-I wouldn't survive if ever there were a drought.

    Man, I'm in love with you...
    Losing you would make my heart NEVER beat again.
    I know with you by my side,
    every obstacle and challenge I'll always win.
    I feel so beautiful with you,
    to explain it, I cant even begin...

    So next time your mind wonders, "What's the deal?"
    look at my pictures, and read my poems...
    Imagine me whispering in your ears,
    and please hear what I'm saying because
    my feelings for you are eternal and unconditional,
    so trust my love is REAL.




    Submitted on 2004-04-08 12:51:35     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      ooookkkkaaayyyyyy.
    trust me when I say that this is too melodic to be a poem..it sounds more like a song to me..

    I don't know if you play an instrument, or can carry a tune, but try it out, the artist in you will help, and I would love to hear the end result!
    | Posted on 2004-09-24 00:00:00 | by Oracle | [ Reply to This ]
      Very pretty, and it gets the message acrossed very well! I like the way its done a lot, sometimes coming straight out isn't the best way to do things, but for this poem it worked well! Keep up the good work! ~Sicobe
    | Posted on 2004-04-08 00:00:00 | by Crow | [ Reply to This ]
      Great work. That is one way to make him understand. I think you explained yourself pretty well. Great wording, straight to the point and just plain beautiful.
    | Posted on 2004-04-08 00:00:00 | by lostandfound | [ Reply to This ]
      wow....I agree with angela....this was a beautiful piece...and in poetry we do explain the things we cannot....it is so real and beautiful....great wrok....
    ~Jaime Lee Pachétte~
    | Posted on 2004-04-08 00:00:00 | by darkened_soul | [ Reply to This ]


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    6213

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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