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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: A small inspirationdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: dylanpoe
    ASL Info:    21 m la
    Elite Ratio:    4.09 - 322/332/56
    Words: 97
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 517
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 578



    Description:
       just a little quick gospel inspiration. give me your thoughts


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsA small inspirationdots
    -------------------------------------------


    do you find yourself crying?
    Can you imagine the pain?
    of giving up your life,
    for someone who doesn't know your name

    Could you take a nail
    to keep the person that killed your kid
    out of hell, and not say one word
    no matter the bad things that you've heard

    so the next time you feel like, life's not fair
    go to that ole church and take up a chair
    and listen to that ole preacher, tell the tale
    of that ole jewish carpenter who gave his life
    to keep us outta hell




    Submitted on 2005-06-10 15:05:51     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      i couldn't feel any emotion here,
    isn't that what poetry is all about?..
    i mean, we all have our own styles, and the words were okay.. it just didn't capture me. nice try though, and i don't mean to come off sounding mean.. i feel bad.. but i can't help but be honest.. brutal honesty is healthy for a person.
    | Posted on 2005-06-10 00:00:00 | by fallingingreen | [ Reply to This ]
      WTF is fallingingreen talking about no emotion? I can see plenty of emotion. Must be a devil worshiper or something.

    This to me had more meaning then I can begin to explain. Just imagine giving up your life to those around you. Those you don't know on top of those you do. Even for those that have done you wrong. Not anyone would be willing to do that! Really I don't know anyone that would.

    This was beautiful. I think that it deserves a lot of credit. Fallingingreen needs to pick up a bible and get their head on straight. This was more then just poetry...this was a lesson!

    BRAVO! *clapping*

    *goes to stand up but falls backwards in chair*

    Awwwww...pickles...*still clapping*

    Li Li
    | Posted on 2005-06-13 00:00:00 | by Munchie_1226 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    62263

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

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    January 10 07
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