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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: War On Channel 4dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Thornful Rose
    ASL Info:    23-female-California
    Elite Ratio:    3.74 - 141/186/49
    Words: 420
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 920
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2866



    Description:
       My war piece.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWar On Channel 4dots
    -------------------------------------------


    Wars are demanding a majority of minutes on the nightly news.
    Replacing the now faded images of peaceful times,
    that you could simply find if you just pushed:
    stop.
    and then rewind.
    These pleasant things are no longer anything more than a dream.
    Unable to be seen on censored cities papers front sheets.
    So, now when our doors swing open media minded,
    its humanities curiousity leading news to be explored.
    And it reads...
    Of dead soldiers stories, but only from one side.
    Of stolen children along with the suspect at fault.
    The saddest part is usually they share the same last name.
    Along with that teenaged themed battles venturing into hate, date and rape.
    Public schools alllow misguided minds to fall socially to fall behind.
    Trapped in magazines false definitions of beauty,
    then twisted with peer pressure longing for exceptance.
    Americans are dying.
    Do we as a country even care?
    How about as a race?
    Is our spinning orb become nothing but a ball of destructive waste?
    We listen to previously promised Presidential lies.
    Written specifically for him: to be heard by you.
    -only thing is their the words of another.
    Here at home, however, our future, in the shape of children have begun to frown and drown.
    In oceans of art-less-ness.
    In seas of insecurity.
    Drowning in teenage pregnancy, addiction and violence.
    Our future cannot breathe.
    Our papers point out facts and figures on sexually transmitted diseased ways,
    and how it has strayed from only effecting the gays.
    High schools harbor highs, drug and steroid buisness buys.
    And lets not forget...
    The semi-automatic revengeful cries of a suicidal teen life.
    War in oru youths.
    War in our own family trees.
    Not to mention the war over seas.
    Its just like the news on T.V.
    WAR.
    But to me fighting for freedom is like fucking for virginity.
    Both a better idea when politically promoted,
    then dictated to the public at large.
    I state this because there is a different war going on inside...
    Inside prison systems over crowded confides.
    But still I wonder why?
    Why are gas prices still so high?
    Havent enough enlisted camoflagued died?
    ...died to save you your cent.
    The one promised by your president.
    All the while we sit in denile from our plush publically broadcasted front line seats.
    And televised just past our reclined feet...
    Previously approved camera views.
    This country is watching behind plasma TV's
    Bolted in behind steel dead bolted doors.
    The channel this world is watching,
    Is war on Channel 4.




    Submitted on 2005-06-14 20:29:12     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      i normal am tierred of reading the stuff on the war. i dont watch tv. there is no point any more. when you dont even get truth. everything is enphasied in self distruction. i really liked your poem though. my two favorit lines are, "Public schools alllow misguided minds to fall socially to fall behind., Here at home, however, our future, in the shape of children have begun to frown and drown.
    In oceans of art-less-ness.
    In seas of insecurity.But to me fighting for freedom is like [censored] for virginity." i am going to share it with some of my family. they well love your poem.
    thanks for your educated comments.
    -snuff
    | Posted on 2005-06-14 00:00:00 | by snufthepunk28 | [ Reply to This ]
      I like your point on the war and how you add in the 'homeland' problems. This is nice and I like how you don't try to sugar coat anything with some fancy lingo. You just say it like you mean it and don't really care if you offend anyone. This is how poetry really should be, straight from the heart. I personally believe that the media is so damn corrupt, they only give the side of the story that sells instead of the real point of view. I like how in the beginning you say the part about stopping and rewinding. I like this part becuase it is very contradictory to reality because we can't just stop and rewind. What is done is done. This was possible my favorite part.
    "like [censored] for virginity"- I'm sorry to say I have heard this line somewhere before. The reference slips my mind, but you still use it well. Thanks for the read, PEACE.
    | Posted on 2005-06-14 00:00:00 | by ConScribe | [ Reply to This ]


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