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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Confuseddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Mysterious Blue
    ASL Info:    18/All woman/Illini
    Elite Ratio:    4.13 - 63/64/15
    Words: 197
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 1039
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1235



    Description:
       Well this goes out to the man I love. He already knows. I like this poem but I was just venting about some of the problems we were having. You know how it is-I think


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsConfuseddots
    -------------------------------------------


    I'm not quite sure
    About all that's going on
    How should I feel about you
    I'm neer happy very long

    You always do something
    And it makes me upset
    So many things are going through my mind
    I wish I didn't fret

    I worry about us so much
    Only because I care
    You're the one true man I love
    With no one else I want to share

    I want you as my own
    But your feelings aren't the same
    Your change your mind daily
    And put me through a lot of pain

    But I know you're always there for me
    That's why I keep holding on
    I don't want to let you go
    Just please don't take long

    I don't want to be fooled
    Into loving someone so much
    The feeling isn't returned
    Except the love and such

    My love for you runs so deep
    I'll always be by your side
    I want to marry you someday
    In you I'll always confide

    I know the problems are there
    But the good pushes it away
    Let the sun brighten our world
    And bring light into our day




    Submitted on 2005-06-15 21:39:53     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      You'll probably have lotsa people relating to this . . .ahhh just take it as part of the relationship downs.
    could relate most to the following stanza (quite sad actually!)
    "I want you as my own
    But your feelings aren't the same
    Your change your mind daily
    And put me through a lot of pain"

    Keep spreading the love
    Nadia*
    | Posted on 2005-06-25 00:00:00 | by AfricanPrincess | [ Reply to This ]
      There was a great deal of self-doubt woven into this simple poem about relationship. There is a sense of "love at all costs" in the message, which makes the problem of reciprocation most difficult.
    | Posted on 2005-06-16 00:00:00 | by The Gadfly | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow, very emotional piece, and I hope you two get things worked out quickly. But now for the poem. Youve got a good xaya rhyme scheme going( one of my favs to use) and a generally followed rhythm pattern( couple of spots, but not much to worry about.) Couple of stanzas almost feel incomplete. I might have done six or eight line stanzas to give the whole thought and more. Four is just so limiting... Anyways, very good emotion, word color, and katovog. Overall, a great write. 8/10
    | Posted on 2005-06-16 00:00:00 | by Poet of Avalon | [ Reply to This ]
      THIS WAS ABOVE AND BEYOND EXCELLENT!

    All these feelings you displayed in this were honest, brief, and simple. You know...I have held onto feelings like this never knowing how to state them. Never knowing how to properly put them on paper...and here...you did it for me!

    BRAVO!

    Li Li

    P.S.- Punctuation would make it perfect!
    | Posted on 2005-06-16 00:00:00 | by Munchie_1226 | [ Reply to This ]
      this was really awesome. it really describes my relationship also. this is very emotional and it will have the ability to touch alot of people its good to see some young people, lol me too: really put their mind into writing something good job
    | Posted on 2005-06-21 00:00:00 | by dylanpoe | [ Reply to This ]


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