I guess I should write like you and type like you
Maybe then I'll be "Aight" like you
You'll never see it!
He is original when his thoughts become physical
It's controversial--might as well call them Biblical
A small giant! You rookies step up and try it
I won't even waste my time, you're small things to a giant
I am: Voice of the hood, the choice of the hood
Got education but I still keep my poise in the hood
The boy's in the hood. I witness it
But it's a problem seems like everytime it hits the script
I can't relate to your pieces...
Your stories of glory and sunny beaches
When what's in my head is serious--
My poems make you see it
I paint the picture in your mind frame of crime, gangs and war
I use my pen to bring it to your front door
Then you ask the boy to give you some more
As you slowly become addict
To the pen you say is problematic
(But I've Had It)
*What's up with these dudes? Everybody wants to test me? Everybody wants a piece of X? Me against the world baby? I'm standing alone and ain't backing down fromm nobody*
Take shots at me, Knock my sheets
I will still keep on dropping that heat
Like it's hot!
Ready or not, I've got a literary glock
When it pops watch the haters mouths drop
Like they're shocked
I can't be something that I'm not;
Poetry is of soul
So my pieces shouldn't read like those
It's Brian exposed--nobody else--
It's just me and my pen
I am my heart so I cannot pretend I'm him
You see I post and you peek
but you never do comment
You don't want me to know that you still read
It's clear in sight, you're too arrogant to like
You can't even fix your hands to type that I can write
You're double minded...neither of your minds can see it
So I'm putting it on paper, you'll be able to read it
The flow is parapledgic...
Yeah it's sick and it can't be cured
Your bait is live but I can't be lured
*So much hate surrounding me...Anger, outrage, disgust. I ain't fucking with nobody so why are they fucking with me? I got people I don't even know challenging me. I guess it's true what they say...To be the best, you've gotta beat the best.*
The last verse brings the worst like a nurse with a needle
Injecting your minds with X's sequel
I'll give you the prequel...Here's a gift, nice to meet you
Then frown on you clowns 'cause your smiles are so see through
My nouns see you...
Nobody named in this piece
But somehow you stillknow to whom I speak
As if my soul has a leak
My poetry is the soles on my feet
Because I've walked into the soul of these streets
End up cold in these streets
You quiver when the line is delivered
Shake! Like Michael Jackson waiting to hear his fate
Case closed! Your dreams died the day that I rose
I've got a list of haters to smash--they on death row
Read the piece...
Then go back and peep the metaphors
My words are sharper than Apostle Peter's sword (Lord)
Repaired your ears after slicing them off
The attention that you pay is the cost
*I'm tired man...I'm tired man...I wish y'all could hear this track! I'm making music on these dudes! Either you love me or leave me alone. That's all I'm asking. I ain't out looknig for no trouble. I ain't picking no fights with nobody because I can't lose. I ain't no bully... I ain't gonna just embarass somebody for the hell of it...Stay out my lane though...Just stay out of my lane...
It's Just Business,
| dang i don't know what's going on and i am 30 years old i stopped listening to rap along time ago but this is deep i bet you i will be trying to follow a little closer from now on but that is what we are all here for to learn from others but you seem confident in who you are don't let any one break you from that||| Posted on 2005-11-23 00:00:00 | by always thinking | [ Reply to This ] || Well I dig this piece...quite...repulsive and entertaining at the same time...I got a great laugh after reading this piece...Im not much of a fan of slam, but sometimes we need2 be HARSH2 get our points across. However I still feel that we as society, should at some point build each other...It dont make sense for your opponents2 be critquing ur artistic capacity...If we aint got nothing good2 say...Lets behold our PEACE its the greatest quality of WISDOM...Overall this is an interesting piece...very artistic!Kind Regards Nobantu||| Posted on 2005-08-06 00:00:00 | by Nobantu | [ Reply to This ] || Two words: [censored]ing Amazing, but since this site requires me to write more than I should I'll just babbel about how good this was. "It's controversial--might as well call them Biblical" was amazing, but it confused me because of what your description said about jesus, its almost like you're contridicting yourself. 5/5, the first 5/5 ive ever given here. And yes, I agree with you - nobody likes to read here they only like to write about their gothic babel; and half the time I do get comments its because of people wanting to get their posting abilities back. Keep in touch.||| Posted on 2005-06-17 00:00:00 | by MrBear | [ Reply to This ] || I'm over here weak as all hell! Boy you make no sense. You call this battle material? THis is just you ranting about some bull sht if you ask me! You go on and on about subjects that don't even meet the criteria.|
And...talkin about a battle field...I read Munchie_1226's post about your weak azz and
#1-she (a white girl) can bite harder then you.
#2-you stealing her terms now with battle field?
You weak azz fake thug. Rest your pen and your mouth. The game has just begun.
When you write something that may actually offend me/let me know.
|| Posted on 2005-06-17 00:00:00 | by Xtremebiter | [ Reply to This ] || I'm just wondering what race or color has to do with a "bite" but *shrug*|
You did bring up a very vaild point in this piece...so many still reading your post but hardly anyone commenting...that alone supports that stanza...
But I wouldnt take it on a personal level comment ratios are very low here on the site...everyone is just reading very few are actually commenting.
The use of metaphors was pretty good but I just didnt feel the over all "slam" essense of your words. I read biters post and thought it was off the chain as far as slam goes i was looking forward to your mic check yet I will be nothing but honest (as always) and say this left me a bit dissapointed.
|| Posted on 2005-06-17 00:00:00 | by Brownsdelight | [ Reply to This ] || I am intrigued, but am going to do my research on this poet called xtremegentleman...Your style is hype your lyrics are light, yet lengthy. A good bash is never more than a sentence away. |
Why you lettin these people affect you anyway. You gave in to the pettiness found on site, trust me I have seen many poets take flight and take there education with them over a couple of punk azz writers who thought they were runnin it.
Don't give into the temptation, continue to fight back with your sheep like individuality.
If this was your last piece left on earth would you be proud?(Don't get mad, just think about that for a sec).
You have the talent and skills your language could be tighter and have more impact, the length takes away from what you are trying to say.
But who am I another "poet" "writer" "stereotyper" to tell you anything other than what you want to hear.
|| Posted on 2005-06-17 00:00:00 | by bluepifany | [ Reply to This ] || I really enjoy reading your writes! You have tremendous expression! I just wonder though if you should let others get to you this way!? They will only feed off this stuff, ya know? Who cares what others think anyway? I think they just want to provoke a reaction from you and to say nothing about them would probably get to them more! Just my opinion. But I do like your talent and hope to read more pertaining to more than just these other people! Take care!||| Posted on 2005-06-17 00:00:00 | by lmz | [ Reply to This ] || So, this slam poetry stuff. I have been following it for a while and it has become quite entertaining and has produced some great one liners and funny lines while trying to disrespect anothers style, words, character. But this one is cool because you didnt mention any names, yet elude to them...if a person has paid attention in all the past posts between you and others, it easy to pick out who certain stanzas are for. But remember...a good overall rap album has to have at least one nice, smooth..."set me by the candlelight with a bottle of wine baby" song on it...and you did that well in the past. Why dont you and all the people that have been doing these slam writings challenge each other to see who could write the best nice, smooth..."set me by the candlelight with a bottle of wine baby" write? Mix it up a bit, ya know? Heck, I might even get involved in that one...hee-hee...hubba-hubba-hubba...vroom, vroom, vroom. HA! Just being dingaholic again. Anyway, have a good one.||| Posted on 2005-06-17 00:00:00 | by hyproglo | [ Reply to This ] || first of all i havent lost i resigned, and i aint gonna do it. it just aint my [censored]. every once in a while ill through one of these pieces out, but you good at this [censored], and i aint scared as you can tell. i wont down your ability to write, i down the way you hold yourself up, thats all. but this captured alot of minds as can tell by the views in my piece "comments" they look but to chicken[censored] to write something. but i will believe that. besides few grammatical errors which are normal this was awesome |
be professional enough to return the favor
|| Posted on 2005-06-17 00:00:00 | by dylanpoe | [ Reply to This ] || Wow. I could totally listen to this as a rap song. :x I loved this. I think you definitely got your point across, and even though I know I didn't do anything wrong, it makes me feel like I should be apologizing. Hah. I'm a dork, but honestly, I read this the whole way through, and my attention to it never wavered. It commands it. There are just a couple of grammatical errors that I don't believe were made on purpose, like |
"As you slowly become addict
To the pen you say is problematic"
become an addict, it's problematic?
Small errors that don't really matter, but it could possibly take away from writings in the future.
I normally dislike how lyrics of any artist can be so arrogant sounding, "I'm better, I always win" type stuff, but in this case, it proved your point and fit perfectly.
Great job. Keep them coming!
|| Posted on 2005-06-17 00:00:00 | by insipid sky | [ Reply to This ] || I have read 1 of the othere posts and I think all of you are talented. I said it before ~ I'm a lover & not a fighter & I beleive as creators & artists we should be more supportive of each other's styles and contributions. But, y'all gotta do what u gotta do. The bigger person is the one that will let [censored] slide off their back.|
You obviously have a talent as do they & this piece was great. Just remember Jesus preached Love & not Hate. Love,Peace,Joy!
|| Posted on 2005-06-17 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ] |