Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Vivid Picturesdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Geraldine
    ASL Info:    25
    Elite Ratio:    3.2 - 241/296/80
    Words: 112
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 821
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 831



    Description:
       hmmm, not quite sure.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsVivid Picturesdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Vivid pictures,
    drawn by you.
    Illuminating colors,
    being sketched into my mind.
    Vibrant shades of red and orange,
    present these visions,
    visions of lust and love,
    dancing through my head.
    The waxy crayon melts in your hand,
    yellow droplets of longing,
    mix with the colors of love.
    Brilliant cascades of blue,
    show the tears we've cried.
    Vivid pictures,
    in my memories,
    drawn by you.
    Creating a work of art,
    from the emotions we have felt,
    using all the colors of the rainbow.
    Purple swirls of sadness,
    flow from your hand,
    showing spirals of pain throughout.
    But the green shimmers brightly,
    giving proof,
    that there's still life at the end of our road.




    Submitted on 2005-06-23 15:07:10     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I really like how you give the colors meaning and how it sounds painful yet hopeful; that's something hard to do. I really like the use of "waxy" and "cascades." Good description.
    | Posted on 2005-06-23 00:00:00 | by literary lover | [ Reply to This ]
      o wow this was a very cute write! it was nicely written i dont think there should be any changes to this. i like how u use colors to describe different feelings/emotions. like how blue were the tears u guys cried and yellow was longing. very nice write! i think its going to go to my favorites!

    brenna
    | Posted on 2005-06-23 00:00:00 | by Day DreaMeR | [ Reply to This ]
      This was a very easy read! The flow was so beautiful, your images so vivid and colorful which melded nicely into the imagery of the poem. I was reminded of a Dylan (that's Bob) line from "lay lady lay" "What ever colors you have in your mind, I'll shown them to you and you'll see them shine!" The difference here is that he puts these colors in your mind - Overall really lovely! I liked it a lot! Steve
    | Posted on 2005-06-23 00:00:00 | by SHRINKSDR | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    63959

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry