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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The workerdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Hidden_depths
    ASL Info:    20/F/England
    Elite Ratio:    3.87 - 37/34/11
    Words: 87
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 252
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 658



    Description:
       This is a deifferent style for me. I've literally just written after watching a motorbike be repaired by its owner. He enjoyed every minute of it and put thought behind problem solving in such a careful way. It was a triumph when it was done but he was already onto a new idea. It was funnily inspirational.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe workerdots
    -------------------------------------------


    There was a dream behind those eyes,
    She felt it within herself,
    Behind her stomach, deep inside.

    Sparkling awe and misadventure,
    A treasure learned,
    A gem perfected without flaw.

    Watching, peering, intaking knowledge,
    Her inspiration unnoticing
    Of her commited student homage.

    'I will look and learn, enjoying your joy'
    'I will remember your effort,
    And satisfaction in fixing your own toy'

    Bright eyes of a worker met her gaze
    A job well done,
    A memeory to be replayed.
    But improvements can be made.




    Submitted on 2005-06-27 12:18:06     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Nice job, interesting approach. First I wondered why this was a passion poem but the last stanza… It made it clear to me. I love how you left an opened door at the end. Now we can replay this one and imagine improvements for ourselves.
    | Posted on 2005-07-02 00:00:00 | by Poly Jean | [ Reply to This ]
      I can clearly see the correlation between the poem and the event you describe witnessing prior to writing it. I think it is an overall good poem.Sort of like an 'ode to do-it-yourselves'
    | Posted on 2005-06-27 00:00:00 | by Tischpeachez | [ Reply to This ]
      yes
    watching other people working hard to improve your lifestyle
    is a pleasure
    I watch as labor workers dig the streets and be like
    wow they are getting messie just for our benefits of using everyday pipes that connects to our sinks
    or watch busboys work hard cleaning tables ect.
    nice poem
    outo
    | Posted on 2005-06-27 00:00:00 | by dudethis | [ Reply to This ]



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