Description: I'm just defining minimalism. I like that it forces your mind to fill in gaps. If I look at black and white pictures, my mind colors them in my memory. That may be an "Amy" phenomenon though.
The Minimalist -------------------------------------------
to their sun-bleached bones
like Ansel Adams
photographing a desert sunset
in onyx blacks, pearl whites, opal grays
that becomes more beautiful
when colored, when completed
by the painter in your mind.
I like this, it was odd but a good read, however, I would change the word becomes to the word become, other than that, nothing to say in the negative on this peice, but it does in fact remind me of my writing sytle : )
Ah a poem which completely describes yourself. Very true though, you leave our own minds to paint and imagine the picture how we so choose, and our minds in return give you the credit and the esteem for leading us to actually doing the hard work ourselves :P
Only kidding about the hard work, for I think we both know that it takes a large amount of talent to be able to do what you do. I speak as though I know, and it's true I believe I understand, but I'm not pretending for a second that I compare myself to what you can achieve with your poetic lines.
hey i liked this poem but to me it seems like the tittle implys like an under acheiver sort of thing and really it is more like a image thing so i would name it somthing relaiting to imagry which is really good in this poem also i liked your descriptive adjectives fer the colors...
Living in a desert made this quite easy to picture... sometimes a million colors hide in the images I see just outside my window... and sometimes the light is so bright that it reduces it to light and shadow... stark, brilliant images.
Just like you I love black and white pictures - they are just more mysterious and grand in a way.
Nope, nope, nope, absolutely the WRONG title. You should call this "Imagist". Great piece here, lots of terrific images; LOVED 'completed by the painter in your mind'. Can't think of anything wrong with it (other than the title).
This is so "you". I love the way you think and the way so many of your poems are about color, and art. The analogy was very fitting and the them proves once more, "less truly is -more".Even the bleached bones is a perfect image for the theme. You are wonderful. Glad you're back! Sally
excellent! indeed, the less you write the more you leave to the readers imagination. Now, done poorly there is not enough for the reader to work with, but done well the reader is set off into a place where he/she can take it far off into the night...like this one here...and most everything you write
best of all, this kind of thing can inspire...you've given me a few ideas here...
"sun bleached bones"...I always love that image...reminds me of those cow skulls in the desert...ya know? And THEN those make me think of cheesy southwestern artwork...but I digress.
"the painter in your mind"...I know that guy...he works non-stop and sometimes to my detriment when he starts painting WAY too much...and I get confused as to if what he's painting is reality or just an over-active imagination. Again, I digress...having trouble keeping a train of thought...perhaps cause I'm going out of town in a few hours...
Anyway...I like minimalism...makes one actually think...(a rarity it seems around here)...especially when you do it, cause you tend to use just the right words to guide the reader's mind to a very exciting and creative place.
Ahhh, Ansel Adams . . . I have a couple of his pieces up, just hodgepodge taken from a calendar years ago. Minimalism, though, well it's a good analogy because there's something beautiful in those photos and in a poem that's done just right. I think you can fill in the colors, <though I couldn't do that with AA's stuff> or you can appreciate a Pasche for it's elaboration, but there's something deeply satisfying when a poem engages the reader and asks him to make a leap.
You draw a good analogy here, with this piece, and it's form is minimalistic enough to set the stage.
I totally relate... it's a shared love I suppose but the less said the more impact it has for me. You've skillfully captured the art of enjoying the minimalist things in life. Color them with your own fantasy and let them guide you to places beyond your dreams and imagination. A wonderful poem!
Well, obviously some people don't see the beauty in minimalist pieces. :) I really liked this. It's interesting to me how you leave this piece up for interpertation and the piece is about leaving art up for interpertation. LoL Sry if that sounded weird. It's what I thought though. I like the references to black and white colors. I find black and white to be very beautiful. Great piece. :)
I like the space you have left around this poem, poetry is an art that co-exists with the senses and imagination. I can't say I color in an Ansel Adams in my mind, it is an Amy phenomena, I believe. I can appreciate the beauty of hues as they cast across the spectrum of black and whites. Your poem is rich with hues too, and yet is tidy as minimalism should be. I'm not exactly the same style, but mine is close, anything that isn't needed, it just goes..great job, thanks for sharing, what do late night houligans know anyway about Ansel Adams? love and hugs, Nan
perfect description of the minimalist Amy! i adore Ansel Adams and the way you describe his photos is wonderful, "to their sun bleached bones.." the black white and gray is great, though i might suggest less commas..? the coup d'etat is the painter coloring it in his mind.. i think of those black&white photos that have just a dash of color.. i like that a lot. yeah.. i'll put pastels on black&white photos.
to be honest this is not a well thought out poem, your set up was out of line, no punctuation, commans, semicolons, ect...you use a bit of imagry. The idea you have for the poem is good you just need to use a variety of words, it dosent flow together to well. Im not trying to be hard on ya, im just trying to help. Short poems are very touching at times, but this is one of those poems that needs details, it needs to foreshadow whats going to happen, next, so work on your set up, word usage, punctuation, capitlization, re write this poem, with a bit of editing, i would love to see how it comes out.
I really like this poem. The human imagination is hard to beat when it comes to creating beauty. You've done a good job of putting just the right words in the right place without wasting a single word. And it's about as long as a poem about "minimalism" should be. Well done.
i'm not sure , if i see the way you meant for it to be , but here goes is it a way of saying the colour has left your life , and so all you see is the blacks and greys by the painter in your mind ( i'm probably wrong but thats how i read it ) let me know th meaning please thanks Take care Lainie