Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Rosesdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: greensnake
    ASL Info:    60/female/ N.C.
    Elite Ratio:    4.17 - 770/691/75
    Words: 14
    Class/Type: Haiku/Friendship
    Total Views: 974
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 84



    Description:
       I awoke to a vase of roses this morning and knew that my neighbor had been here in the night to leave me a present from her garden. What a wonderful gift. What a wonderful awakening.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsRosesdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Roses on my porch
    When I awoke this morning
    Friends came in the night.




    Submitted on 2005-07-06 00:56:30     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I love roses! You say your neighbor left em for you...that was really nice of her. You referred to it as Friends came in the night. I know you meant the friends was your neighbor, but it could also mean that the roses had bloomed out overnight...so that makes it fit just that much better.
    We have some wonderful neighbors too, but I see Doc has already told you that.
    DJ
    | Posted on 2005-07-21 00:00:00 | by Doris Jean | [ Reply to This ]
      I would say what a wonderful neighbor! I mean I have good neighbors that will help me do just about anything, but they ain't left me no roses yet!
    You're so lucky!
    !Doc`
    | Posted on 2005-07-08 00:00:00 | by dr_tigger | [ Reply to This ]
      This is haiku is so sweet. Other than sweet, its great that you still think about your frineds.. How touching..
    Great haiku

    Stephanie
    | Posted on 2005-07-06 00:00:00 | by XxStephyxX04 | [ Reply to This ]
      Hmm...I don't really know if i do like this. It really didn't say all that much. It is as if you said the poem in your description. I'm not really into hikuas that much so maybe that is why it really doesn't interst me. But you much have a very nice neighbor/friend. I do admit...this is sweet. But not much more i can really say.


    Mikki
    x3
    | Posted on 2005-07-06 00:00:00 | by MiKkI25 | [ Reply to This ]
      This is a sweet little thing. Like it a lot. You've got very nice friends, I guess.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Peace,

    Joey
    | Posted on 2005-07-06 00:00:00 | by joeyalphabet | [ Reply to This ]
      I like this haiku a lttle more than your previous one. It's getting better, but I dunno, I didn't really like the last line because I was hearing your story, and then all of a sudden it jumps to the end of the day. Pretty good though, 4/5
    | Posted on 2005-07-06 00:00:00 | by MrBear | [ Reply to This ]
      I think this was a really good Haiku. You should try to add a tad bit more imagery though. It would really bring out this piece.
    | Posted on 2005-07-06 00:00:00 | by Lipgl0ssed | [ Reply to This ]
      I love how you say so much with so few lines. A good Haiku, I would enjoy seeing you develop this skill. Could be a little more mystical though.
    | Posted on 2005-07-06 00:00:00 | by Arrowcat | [ Reply to This ]
      dont think this is a poem as such

    it could be... but three lines isn't bunch

    it would be different if they blow you away

    but your not saying much

    just a senctence with line breaks

    There were roses on my porch when I awoke this morning, friends came in the night. i felt awakward holding them, dizzy with the fragrance.

    a story maybe?

    i dont know

    it needs more to be something

    on the flipside
    -DS
    | Posted on 2005-07-06 00:00:00 | by playing card | [ Reply to This ]
      Awww! That is so sweet! You really have a special friend! And it is twice as nice as she grew them herself! What a nice way to start the day! Take care.
    | Posted on 2005-07-06 00:00:00 | by lmz | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    65497

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    The World written by jjd
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Rooted in Nature written by Chelebel
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    Deep written by Janesaddiction

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry