Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Something to Remember You Bydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: HurtDeepDown
    ASL Info:    24/F/OHIO
    Elite Ratio:    4.2 - 165/161/42
    Words: 217
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 805
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 1296



    Description:
       This is just about a girl dealing with a breakup. Then realizing that judging from what she had, it could never be over. Yes, this is sort of about me, but not really. I just was thinking of a plot to write about and decided that I should think of what it would be like for me to break up with my boyfriend. I'm so emotionally attached to him so this is kind of what I would feel in that situation. Any thoughts on this would be great.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSomething to Remember You Bydots
    -------------------------------------------


    I still wear that gold bracelett you gave me,
    and your pictures still owns a spot beside my bed,
    and I am not exactly sure why I keep it there,
    but it always helps me cry to sleep.
    Most morning I wake up early,
    and my mind always thinks your there,
    so I'll roll over to my side,
    and it's not all fun and games when I see you're gone.
    My mind hits rewind,
    it flashes a picture of your eyes,
    and it makes me wish I was looking into them,
    just to make me smile once more.
    I was always fond of your voice too,
    on the phone it always gave me that feeling of being safe,
    and we'd talk about living together in a huge house,
    and even planned on trying to have a kid.
    You know, this isn't easy,
    and I'm still sitting by my phone,
    hoping it might ring,
    cause I know that we're not over.
    I, myself, am in complete disbelief,
    "I wil never leave you, I promise",
    I remember you saying those words to me,
    and I wish I could hear you say them again.
    I softly press my hands over my eyes and wipe off the tears,
    and I drift away to sleep,
    and in my imagination,
    my phone rings.




    Submitted on 2005-07-07 13:40:08     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Wow. I liked this poem too! All of your work amazes me. I write a lot of poems like this, but they eventually get lost in my room before I can get a chance to transfer them. v.v... And if these are or were your real feelings, I know this is probably a little late for this situation, but I hope everything works out from now on in your life/love life. Good luck! And once again, this is a fave! <3~

    -Linds
    | Posted on 2006-10-27 00:00:00 | by brokenxheartedx | [ Reply to This ]
      wow this is so me ...my bf on and of for two years moved about a week ago and hasnt called or anything ... so for the past week ive been waiting ...its hard and this poem really expresses what i have been feeling well its good to know others have been there waiting by the phone not putting the picture away...
    | Posted on 2005-12-24 00:00:00 | by blacktearz | [ Reply to This ]
      This was my life about a month ago...though it was a simple write "simple" meaning there are no discriptions that pop out or metaphors that grasp the readers muse it is still a read that a lot of people can relate to.
    | Posted on 2005-07-07 00:00:00 | by Brownsdelight | [ Reply to This ]
      I can relate to this. Myboyfriend and I have been together for ever it is hard to imaginelife without. I think the flow was great at the beginning and then at the eight line it get lost and then you pick it up again. Overall it was fasinating.
    -Cre
    | Posted on 2005-07-07 00:00:00 | by cre | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    65669

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry