Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Are lifedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: bluesoxz
    ASL Info:    16fohio
    Elite Ratio:    3.17 - 71/101/38
    Words: 356
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 880
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2008



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAre lifedots
    -------------------------------------------


    Until your heart takes
    its last beat I will keep
    It pumping Before you
    Soul gives up I will
    Carrie it through to
    The other side. for
    You to live I will give
    My life.

    To see you smile I
    Will indoor your pain.
    Take everything away
    For you my loved one.
    Before you Say I quit
    I will kiss you on your
    Soft lips.

    Im your shield you hide
    under.Im your protector
    That guards you.Im your
    Lover that makes sweet
    Love to you.Im the angel
    That sings in your dreams.

    When your weak baby I
    Will sweep you off your
    Feet.Take you somewhere
    Were its only us then Tell
    You no matter what hide
    inside Baby you know I
    Will never leave your side.

    Hear the sounds of are
    children making laughter
    Then sit back and wonder
    What would life be without
    Each other.
    Smile as Are kids say
    There first word then tell
    me there is something to
    Live for

    Scream out loud when
    They walk for the first time
    Then let the joy of us and
    Are family feel your heart.

    Hold your breath As we
    Bring two kids in the world
    And look at me and say
    baby I love you because
    We made it this far.

    Don't give up just yet.
    Fight the fight that there
    is and baby I promise you
    Everything will be ok.

    Close your eyes as I
    make love to you.Everyday
    of are lifes is going to be
    something new.Picture
    us being a family.Picture
    Are selfs dancing in the
    Rain just because We
    Are deffrent.

    Remember the day we said
    I do because that was the
    Day I promised I would never
    Leave you.






    Submitted on 2005-07-11 21:24:35     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      awwwwww...its so sweet. I love everything...the rhyme...it could use some editing lol but other than that...its a really beautiful poem.
    | Posted on 2005-07-12 00:00:00 | by poeticstorm | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow.. this is an wsome poem the person must be real special for you to feel so strongly. It brought tears to my eyes(I love it when that happens). It has a great flow and an awsome feel. I'm glad i ran across this one it makes my bad day a bit better thanx for the great read.
    Georgina
    | Posted on 2005-07-12 00:00:00 | by Raye | [ Reply to This ]
      this is pretty good but there are some errors such as(indoor i think you meant endure),(carrie should be carry)and your putting are but i think you mean our... but other than that this is a decent poem. pan
    | Posted on 2005-07-11 00:00:00 | by pandora22 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    66181

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry