The sturdy rock, cold and hard against my feet
Breaking my skin, causing undescribable pain
And I look out toward the soft sand
Reaching it with only my eyes
Tears fall from my cheeks hitting the harsh rock
I wish for the welcoming sand
And I think of how refreshing it would be to sink down
To sink into it's comfort
To rest in it's give, availability in each step
But the dead rock is all I feel, all I know
I curl up on it's cruel surface,
And I continue to cry for the comforting sand.
i really love this piece. very wonderfully done. portrayed so beautifully. wonderfully written so that the reader can feel your pain. see this person and their hurt. really could feel every word as it stabbed at your heart. wonderful job- jennifer
OH boy, oh boy can I understand. Things are going rough for you I take it? Yeah, life aint that easy overall is it? Keep your chin up hun, and a smile on your face:O)
I could feel this piece as being a relationship piece. You're with your man now (the hard rock because things have grown cold) and all you want is to be with someone more loose...the sand. Or, you're having a tough life over all and you want to pay a visit to the other side of the green grass to see what its like. Just remember, sand has shards of broken glass all over it.
Anyway, we all need our venting, and for a venting piece this was good. I know normally people dont like looking at other people and feeding them pity, but you didnt ask for pity, so I'm surprised you haevnt gotte any comments yet.
The piece in itself, was good. Didnt have much puntuation but punctuation shmuchtiation? Yeah.
I enjoyed reading it, not that that means much. Your rock and sand metaphor, was great however. Great job, and sorry I havent much to say against it!