Physical Pain by Blindly-N-Love

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Submission Name: Physical Pain dots

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Author:	Blindly-N-Love
ASL Info:	17/F
Elite Ratio:	4.61 - 197/141/29
Words:	125

Class/Type:	Random Thoughts/Trapped
Total Views:	238
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	781

Description:
Ok.. Don't tell me "oh, your too young to know what love is." Who said this is about me. Dont you love your parents?? Maybe love is over a dog thats run away, or a person in your familys dead. Dont tell me anything about age and love.. PLEASE..
Tell me what you think about the poem and its concept!! Thanks.

Physical Pain dots

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Take your scissors and cut me open,
Rip out my heart, and watch it pump.
Watch it stop, because it can't hold on.
Watch it die slowly and in agony.
Watch it...
Bash my head against the wall,
Give me memory loss, or death.
Torture me physically,
I can take it.
But what you did,
Can NEVER be forgiven.
It hurts worse than cutting me apart.
It hurts worse than ripping out my heart,
Throwing it upon the floor,
And stepping on it with spikiey shoes.

Put me on the other side of a blunt object,
Do something for me one more time.
Put me out of this pain,
Instead of breaking my heart,
And making me die,
Slowly, and unstoppably.

Submitted on 2005-07-14 20:09:43 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
  well first off i dont think anyone can be to young to be in love. so who ever says that is full of BS. anyways i cant tell who its about but whoever it is about i can see caused you a lot of pain and they should be the ones who die not you even if its just your soul dying. nice work. Jessi~
| Posted on 2005-07-29 00:00:00 | by slntfirflm | [ Reply to This ]
  [censored]. let me just say you rock. this is almost exactly like a poem i wrote last year when i was heartbroken over the guy i loved. i dont know if yours is about a relationship gone bad or something with family, but i totally know how you feel. you did a kick ass job of giving us a visual of how badly your hurting. its always awesome when someone can SHOW pain. you know? but anyway, i enjoyed it, especially because it's totally my style.
| Posted on 2005-07-15 00:00:00 | by xvacantxskiesx | [ Reply to This ]
  I thought this was really great and as it is read you can see the hate, and hurt that have been showed. I think that this is good because it is something so very real to many...great job on this one
*Samy*
| Posted on 2005-07-15 00:00:00 | by samyalone | [ Reply to This ]
  Welcome back, For a while we thought we lost you.

This poem offers a grim look into the anguish of a person with a lost pasion. The fatal sound of a broken dream.

Far more detailed and driven by passion from experience that you have encountered.

The tone set in this peice gives us a look into the receiving end of a person to person treatment that went sour.

I think its a good reminder of what can happen when you let your gaurd down.

Life is truly expereinces best teacher and this validates it.

look forward to reading more.

D
| Posted on 2005-07-15 00:00:00 | by Unicrom | [ Reply to This ]

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