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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: "Whispers In The Wind"dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: DeadValentine
    ASL Info:    17-F-TN
    Elite Ratio:    4.32 - 246/132/32
    Words: 180
    Class/Type: Poetry/Lostfriend
    Total Views: 284
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1273



    Description:
       Some pathetic attempt at writing. Suddenly inspired. Obviously, it's about Chris.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dots"Whispers In The Wind"dots
    -------------------------------------------


    Your name...
    A whisper in the wind...
    It sounds so strange vocalized.
    I never meant
    For it to seem
    Like you were forgotten.

    An apology.
    Meaningless, and yet, still spoken.
    It doesn't matter now.
    Just like it didn't a year ago.
    What can I say for myself?
    I still try.

    I love you.
    Still, to this day.
    It doesn't matter.
    Yet, for the friend...
    The person you were...
    I love you.

    A thank you
    Floats off across the feild,
    Carried on the tops of the hay.
    For listening and being there.
    For understanding and teaching
    Like no one else could.

    I miss you.
    What can I say?
    I still can't believe
    You're not here sometimes.
    It still hurts,
    But, the pain, it's fading.

    I need you.
    Now...more than ever.
    I need more lessons...
    More time to learn.
    A few more days to laugh.
    To forget the past.

    Goodbye...
    A whisper in the wind
    Sent out to you
    In a final attempt to let go.
    I hope that you hear it...
    From across this field.




    Submitted on 2005-07-19 22:07:23     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This was a very well thought out piece, flowing together in a nice, wonderful read even without the aide of ryhming ( I still need that ^-^) I loved it, and it expresses the statements you say at first so beautifully that the reader is instantly drawn in, great job...
    | Posted on 2005-12-02 00:00:00 | by Lady Almira | [ Reply to This ]
      this was beautiful. really liked this alot. it had so much feeling.
    You are a good writter.. so its not an attempt.. you always do a great job.
    and keep writting about it..
    atleast you can.
    i cant even write about things so personal.
    its hard..
    i cant find words.
    though it was so beautifully devoted to your freind.
    your feelings came out so wonderfully as i could see your sadness.
    this was well written-
    jennifer
    | Posted on 2005-07-25 00:00:00 | by joy7542 | [ Reply to This ]
      This was great. I could feel the sadness and sincerity in every word. I know exactly how you feel. I feel the same way about Hunter. I miss him so much. When you look back on the silly fights you had and all the meaningless things that you fought about... It makes you want to cry. All the wasted moments that you could have spent laughing. The hole left in your heart feels like it can never be healed, and I suppose it can't, but I think it will get smaller. At least I hope, for both of us. You did a good job writing this. I hope you feel better soon. :)
    LeAnna
    | Posted on 2005-07-24 00:00:00 | by RedRoseofBlood | [ Reply to This ]
      This wasn't "a pathetic attempt at writting" like you mentioned above. This piece seemed heart felt and genuine, which in my experience is the beginning to a really great poem. Keep writing, just like with anything else it just takes a lot of practice and work.
    | Posted on 2005-07-19 00:00:00 | by kriley6497 | [ Reply to This ]



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