Description: This was written to-day. I was moving into our new flat and it was extremely frustrating. When I was inside and alone, I spoke the first line "Where is the poison when I need to drink?". I had just gorged myself with disgusting food and felt well...disgusting. Then, my mother was just existing; which annoys me on a regular basis. Life hasn't been too peachy what with my recent religious abandon. So, I figured poison right about then wouldn't have been so bad. Anyways, I'll quit talking and post the poem. I apolagize if the rhyme is a bit off, I'll edit it when I have the time.
Post Suicide Questions -------------------------------------------
Where is the poison when I need to drink?
One glass half empty would put me to sleep.
Where is the full moon when I can not see?
These bloody, scarred hands too long have led me.
Where is the blade when I need a gash?
Unbalanced emotional pain shall not last.
Where is the poet when I’ve no epitaph?
His words and my note would surely clash.
Where is the mortician when I still have a lung?
Pumping dead air, where once was fresh blood.
Where is the noose from which I was hung?
The death-stained passport to the land of the numb.
Where is my tombstone when I lose my own grave?
The fit of my coffin, I would then crave.
Where is my freedom when I am death’s slave?
I knew my damned soul, your God wouldn’t save.
Well suicide is a selfish way out of things, I'm sure everyone has days when they would rather die than do anything else (i know i have) and that is normal but if you actually do it and succeed then not only do you hurt yourself but you hurt everyone else around you. About the poem its good but dont worry about rhyming i hardley ever rhyme. Poetry isent all about rhyming, if our thoughts and emotions were limited to only words that go together then we wouldnt be able to express ourselves fully. Well thats about it though. to sum it all up, don't die, and dont worry so much about rhyming.
what i like about it is that it covered differnet thing s that were [censored] with you at the time. like the religious confusion, the blandness of existance. i liked how you described each one.
Pumping dead air, where once was fresh blood.
that jumped out at me. very vivid. morid and beautiful, if that makes any sense~nahlij
Wow...that was cool...Pretty intense too...sort of, in it's own way...but i liked it. There was just something in it, the whole questioning thing...after death, it makes the poem so...Mysterious...
I don't think that you have to rhyme to make a poem a great poem...this is great as it is. but i have no say on what you do with it, it is your work and do with it what you please, i think it is perfect though the way it is now...anyways, great work at creating this mysterious, sad, cold piece of work. great job.
Submission Name: Post Suicide Questions
