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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Musical Dreamsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Restless_Heart
    Elite Ratio:    5.37 - 44/35/16
    Words: 119
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 873
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 700



    Description:
       Another old one but very true.Need a title though. Please? And thank you.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMusical Dreamsdots
    -------------------------------------------


    The beauty, the flow,
    Moving, pushing me on,
    Keeping a love of life from dying out,
    It keeps me here,
    It keeps me near,
    The only place in the world I do not fear,
    Scared of it never will I be,
    Good enough to get on stage and scream,
    Make you sway and keep you sane,
    Telling you everything will be ok,
    Before you know it you'll be singing the words
    Night and day,
    Believe me when I say I love it,
    Believe me when I say,you'll enjoy it,
    Beauty everlasting,never fading,
    So go now,
    Use your talent, sing!
    Sing the music I love,
    I will be big one day, like you.




    Submitted on 2005-07-19 23:06:53     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

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    4: Pretty cool
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    ||| Comments |||
      I suggest My Idol as a title or maybe My Musical Dream.

    Nice little poem you have there. I know a bit what you r talking about. I know a musician and the passion he has for his music.
    You have captured the passion and depicted in the poem, i mean u have amusical flow. We have the felling that it is rocking us a bit.
    till the verse: "Before you know it you'll be singing the words night and day"

    I suggest you make it 2 or 3 verses actually:

    Before you know it you'll be
    singing the words
    night and day

    That is the only thing I have to say about structure.
    Otherwise your poem is too simple, yet enjoyable. No complex imagery, not hidden meaning, just an invitation to share your passion.

    Not an exceptional piece but an exceptional passion.

    Peace
    Viviane
    | Posted on 2005-07-20 00:00:00 | by babyblue002 | [ Reply to This ]


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    67252

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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