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    dots Submission Name: I can't learn...dots

    Author: painofthanatos
    Elite Ratio:    4.32 - 684/571/86
    Words: 172
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 835
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1034

       old poem...not so sure if i like it...too much me in it, ya know?
    luckily i'm a bit happier now. I think psychology class with the shrill woman is just enough to make anyone miserable...lol.
    I just needed something new to post
    anyway, tell me what you think

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsI can't learn...dots

    In a class, drop spinning a stolen blue pen
    She's lecturing us on memory,
    but I've forgotten most of what she's said
    I think all those hours of colouring my world with sharpies has gone to my head
    I'm learning how to hate writing
    And loathe reading
    But I can't learn how to stop breathing

    I've given up on finding someone to love
    I've given up on trying to find a friend
    But I can't seem to give up completely
    And bring my life to an end
    the over doses are never enough
    And all the ropes I bring to my neck
    Fall limp in my hands before I'm completely gone
    And I have all of the bruises to prove it
    Everytime I try to hold my head under the water
    My mouth gasps for water before my mind can stop it

    And now I'm giving up on giving up
    Will I forever be a quitter
    Succumbing to the misery of whatever is placed in front of me...?

    Submitted on 2005-07-20 21:05:09     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      whoaaa courtney. i like this alot. u come up with awesome works. i know these things say not to give just compliments, but i really just love it and have nothing i think u should change about it.

    | Posted on 2005-12-08 00:00:00 | by roxygirl | [ Reply to This ]
      inspired by bobo's class? haha yea

    [[She's lecturing us on memory,
    but I've forgotten most of what she's said]]
    haha good piece of irony

    [[But I can't learn how to stop breathing]]
    i thought that line was cool

    [[My mouth gasps for water before my mind can stop it]]
    did you mean "air" in place of "water"?

    i liked this
    | Posted on 2005-07-24 00:00:00 | by sudie | [ Reply to This ]
      Giving up on giving up...good line. Kind of like sick and tired of being sick and tired. I liked the whole write and it was easy to get into. The feeling of not being able to give up was quite inspirational and just made it seem a little uplifting...is that weird...?
    Have a good one and keep writin'
    | Posted on 2005-07-24 00:00:00 | by hyproglo | [ Reply to This ]
      i like it... the first stanza is tops... it's very... cute.. it reminds me of a girl that means a lot me...

    i think i like it, cause it shows a sence of humor... ya know... parts are said but it's pretty funny too...

    She's lecturing us on memory,
    but I've forgotten most of what she's said

    thats a great line.. it made me laugh... i think with a little more work this could be great

    just try and clear out your thoughts

    give reasons for why you feel like that... this would help a lot in the seconds stanza...

    this is a cool little poem

    on the flipside
    | Posted on 2005-07-20 00:00:00 | by milo stills | [ Reply to This ]
      I love this. I found the whole thing to be completely amazing. Your words described me perfectly. There is nothing I don't like about it. I have nothing negative to say. Great job

    | Posted on 2005-07-20 00:00:00 | by Liv2LoveThePain | [ Reply to This ]
      The first part, made me chuckle a little, I just got done doing summer psychology yesterday. And it made me kind of giggle. Lol. The end of it was cool. I was different from the beginning, but still good. And for this being some of your begining work, I can only imagine what awesome stuff you have now. Lol.
    | Posted on 2005-07-20 00:00:00 | by Blindly-N-Love | [ Reply to This ]

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