A one room apartment,
Suffocating so small.
It's been three days straight
With no sleep at all.
And longer than that
Since she'd answer my calls.
I try to get some air, throw the window open
But I find no help there, the way I'd been hopin'
She had said, "It's the rule in apartments this small,
(If you're lucky enough to have windows at all)
That they'll only open to show you brick walls."
So I take to the street, seeking release,
Pounding the pavement under my feet.
I cruise down dark alleys,
Cross streets dodging cars,
I stroll by the theater
I walk past a bar...
A guy I know stands in the door.
He asks where I'm heading for.
I offer a handshake and quick hello,
But I can't really tell him where I'm plannin' to go
'Cause alook in my head lets me see I don't know.
He sees it too, that there's nowhere I'm goin',
And it's cold outside, and the wind is blowing.
So he says, "Have a beer," all easygoing.
I try to respond, but I find I can't speak,
The loop in my head: without her, no sleep.
I smile at his offer
Then go on my way,
('Cause it's no fun to drink
When there's nothing to say.)
And I couldn't to him, even though he's my friend,
He'd think I done up and went off the deep end.
And I knew with my friend I couldn't pretend
That my head was all good and my heart on the mend.
The words chokin' my throat were not meant for him.
So back to my cell, a touch more depressed,
Not feeling as well as I had when I'd left.
If I call her again,
And she answers the phone,
Will I find her, like me,
Wide awake, all alone?
And then find the words
That will bring her back home.
Across the room, the bed now stands,
Its move has left marks on the floor.
Its head lies beneath the window;
Its foot by the deadbolted door.
I put pillows on the windowsill
Then we lie down,
Our faces upturned
Forty feet from the ground.
Now from the window she sees no brick wall,
Her eyes instead find the stars.
While mine find hers as we drift into sleep
and dream dreams of life on Mars.