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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Glass Rose Cocktaildots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Emma_closes
    ASL Info:    15/f/fl
    Elite Ratio:    4.28 - 88/111/44
    Words: 151
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 237
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 987



    Description:
       I wrote this while sitting in a bar tonight, noting the fact that the cocktail glasses resemble roses to an uncanny degree, and just wishing that everyone there wasn't so damned discontent.


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    dotsGlass Rose Cocktaildots
    -------------------------------------------


    I sit in a hazy hole of drunken misconceptions
    staring with disdain at a few select men
    who sit perched over glass roses,
    filled with an amber liquid
    and a maraschino cherry.
    They clutch the crystal stems and take sips
    in between mumbled words.

    There is a single connecting look
    in every pair of eyes.
    It is the look of being
    so damned discontent.
    And they’re drinking away yesterday,
    I can see it as it leaves their minds.

    They try to drink fast enough
    to forget today and yesterday
    all at once.
    But they never quite succeed,
    though it doesn’t keep them from trying.

    And I know that if I stumble into the same bar
    at about the same time tomorrow,
    they’ll be there again,
    sipping cocktails from glass roses
    that have no leaves or thorns
    and smiling at the notion
    that they no longer have a past.




    Submitted on 2005-07-22 19:51:11     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I found this to be very vivid. I could see through the dim smokey air and smell the mixture of scents that makes a bar distinctive.

    I love the message and metaphors. Good job!

    Chrystine
    | Posted on 2005-07-23 00:00:00 | by beatthedrum | [ Reply to This ]
      The metaphor was nice, but I get the feeling there was more you could add to it; the fragrance, or allure of the rose could be the taking away of yesterday, and instead of rims, maybe kissing a glassy petal?

    And I'd call it the forget-me-not cocktail, for irony.
    | Posted on 2005-07-22 00:00:00 | by EternitysLyre | [ Reply to This ]
      wow this makes me think of a different perhaps "metaphor" for lack of a better word... the way you ended with

    sipping cocktails from glass roses
    that have no leaves or thorns

    made me think of the anatomy of a rose and what people see in them... they love them for the beauty, and they love them for the smell... unfortunately most often people don't take the time to smell the roses because of their fear of the thorns... now the metaphor i was lookin at was that because these glass roses had no thorns then the people drinking from them had no reason to stop... there was no painful incentive... so perhaps the lack of thorns symoblizes addiction, or the will to forget... i dunno but it brought up some interesting thoughts and i thank you for that... i just gotta wonder, what were ya doin sittin in a bar?? meh, either way it gave birth to a great poem... very well done my friend... take care of yerself...

    Travis
    | Posted on 2005-07-22 00:00:00 | by Mwa Ha Ha Ha Ha | [ Reply to This ]



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