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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Quiet Pilldots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Shahdin
    Elite Ratio:    4.37 - 53/70/28
    Words: 176
    Class/Type: Prose/Love
    Total Views: 221
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 923



    Description:
       A universal theme: Love Lost, we can all relate.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsQuiet Pilldots
    -------------------------------------------


    There was a moment within this fool’s game where I held your stare with a power beyond my own.

    The moment was taken away from me or should I say I took it away from myself, without intention.
    The Here and the Now remain in my sad presence and console me of what could have been.
    I suppose the finale came and went. I am just in denial.
    Somehow in the direst seconds, as I hold on to nothing that is left of you in this pathetic reality, I lay my head down to escape the conscious realm.
    The dream world at least offers me the quiet pill; intimate dreams of you and I, the way we were supposed to be.
    The night does not last forever.
    My lazy eyes open to witness the passing of another day without you.

    So I move on and move on, your memory may become non-existent when I am old and feeble but I will forever have you in my eternal dreams.




    Submitted on 2005-07-25 13:46:06     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This is a really nice piece of writing! I can so relate to your feelings. I like how you refer to sleep and the dream state as the "Quiet Pill". Even a broken heart can continue to dream of a love lost and the brain and the heart kind of work together to produce those images and feelings. This is such a sad write as the longing is felt through your words and the disappointment upon awakening goes without saying. This is very good indeed! take care!

    Lorna
    | Posted on 2005-08-01 00:00:00 | by lmz | [ Reply to This ]
      Yes indeed, Now this one is a real poetic piece of work. The dream world at least offers me the quiet pills...this was a good line. Dreams are our fantasy! Forever have you in my eternal dreams is awesome. Life changes, people change but your dreams can remain the same. That's how you intend to keep the dream alive in your heart! Great write!...take care, wanda
    | Posted on 2005-07-25 00:00:00 | by bigfineq | [ Reply to This ]



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