I open the door to walk the dog…
into the most evil of weather…!
Damn hot and humid.
I’ve been hoodwinked into the heat.
Doggie-yanked to a moist hell.
A song of irony occurs…
“I’m a cool-breeze lovin’ Yankee!
A soggy noodle in the sun!
A real live daughter of my dear old Ma.
Her sweat glands (like mine) mal-func-tion.”
“Shit!” Wheeze to breathe…
Whine…a hope for quick pissing.
I’m led dragging plow-feet
through the grass yellowed with scorch.
The puppy sniffs…and sniffs,
eats a leaf covered in something.
“Please hurry puppy…please!”
Finally a squat!
The sweet tinkle of relief
to signify the denouement
of our saga in the sun.
Puppy pauses to register “uncomfortable”,
and looks to me in needs of a savior.
We're so far now! A whole block from home!
Like slugs traveling in salt,
we head back…
trudging toward non-violent air
in hopes of return without stroke.
The last steps are hobbled.
The entry before us glows
with a choral “ahhhhh”
to welcome us home.
I open the door to our freon-enhanced hideaway.
Blast! Alberta Clipper in my purple face!
Breathe! We pant together in agreement of comfort.
Puppy and I collapse like rugs
on the parquet cool with conditioning…
and together we vow
never to venture into July again.
| mary my dear friend, you seem to have rediscovered your voice. Not that you haven't been writing good stuff all along, but the last few seem to recapture that sarcastically sweet simple observations of life thing that I fell in love with so many months ago. So much to love here...|
I’ve been hoodwinked into the heat.
Doggie-yanked to a moist hell
a hope for quick pissing
beautiful! in fact, I think this is the centerpiece of the poem and could very well be the title. In fact, PLEASE make it the title!
everything else is great. Your descriptions are spot on...if I can whine about anything I would say that I didn't find the "song of irony" to add much (but then again it is part of you, this cute, wry humor stuff) and possibly that you could do better than "non-violent air" but that is being a little on the picky side.
I enjoyed it immensely.
|| Posted on 2005-07-27 00:00:00 | by deadndreaming | [ Reply to This ] || that's why i have cats, they don't need walking! by the by, how is that big queen Don doing?|
i'm really glad i don't live in that kind of heat. it's hot enough here for me... and it's nothing compared to what you get.
the things we must endure for our pets, eh? this was amusing and i could just see you and your doggie falling down in the cool breeze of home. stay out of the heat! perhaps a "doggie box..." haha, just kidding.
|| Posted on 2005-07-26 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ] || super sweet mary. This reminds me of every single day with my beloved 12 week old chocolate lab, Howie. Our time in the hot yard is always laced with the smell of frying dog turds...mmmmmm. I love how you have taken something as simple as taking the dog out for a whiz into 13 stanza's of poetry. You do it with your usual graceful air. |
|| Posted on 2005-07-26 00:00:00 | by Magnolia | [ Reply to This ] || Ah Mary and I thought you liked the Sunshine! You could come and visit me down under and freeze your butt and the mutt's butt off as the ice-cold Southerly blows up from Antartica. What is this revelation? You sweat! No way, didn't your mummy tell you that horses sweat, men perspire and ladies only glow? What happened to the line with "poodle" that just had slip in somewhere next to that soggy noodle? I'm also shocked that you didn't mention your pooper-scooper or the handy plastic bag you carry at all times for your puppy's excrement. However, as I'm totally nuts about dogs, I'll have to grudgingly concede that I loved your poem. Alex and Bonny send their regards to your puppy.|
|| Posted on 2005-07-25 00:00:00 | by hanuman | [ Reply to This ] || very cute poem, wonderful imagery and very detailed and descriptive...brought the picture straight to my head...I especially like how you brought the puppy into the poem..it made it much more playful and...well more realistic...kudos, its a great piece|
|| Posted on 2005-07-25 00:00:00 | by Dimension_X | [ Reply to This ] || I really like your imagery here. It made me laugh with the gasp of relief that was felt re-entering the house at the end of the poem. It was interesting to see that both the human and the puppy were feeling the same hatred of the heat.||| Posted on 2005-07-25 00:00:00 | by Linksquest | [ Reply to This ] || Shucks, sound like here in Louisiana. I like your |
write. Nice and detailing.
Like slugs trudging in salt! Ouch! That burns like hell.lol ( Hot to their touch.) You really described that quest. Hot, slow and burning. Phew! Your write's making me sweat and in need of air and water!lol...
Today it was 114 with heat index. Hot humid and steamy. My lil dogs go out to do their thing and quickly run back inside. Me, I try not to go out til the sun goes down. take care, sorry to hear about your dog. wanda
|| Posted on 2005-07-25 00:00:00 | by bigfineq | [ Reply to This ] || Ha ha! Great piece! I know that feeling too. Last Sunday I put out some mulch and stone (heat index was about 110) and wound up panting and red-faced after only 30 minutes. |
Of course the other thing is going from AC into the humid heat and having my #$%*&! glasses fog up for 2 minutes...
You should submit this to your local paper or something.
|| Posted on 2005-08-19 00:00:00 | by joeyalphabet | [ Reply to This ] |