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    dots Submission Name: On The Down Sidedots

    Author: rws
    ASL Info:    57/m/ohio
    Elite Ratio:    8 - 2777/1297/258
    Words: 128
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 667
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1087

       No great masterpiece, just a meditation on the disatisfaction of life carefully plotted to express both sides of the coin; the depressed, and the unfeeling listener becoming depressed.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsOn The Down Sidedots

    At the base
    of our beings
    there is an ennui
    nothing can erase
    no eloquence can dissever
    no delicacy trace.
    Despite the lovers
    we've embraced
    the coldness in our bones
    never seems displaced
    with dozens of pursuits
    etched in another face.
    In the deadly mirror
    a stabbing
    piercing sadness
    something commonplace.

    There are those times
    we politely listen
    to the myriad
    troubles of others
    until we become
    with their
    stale sorrows
    dragging us deep
    into a smooth
    sleek pit
    somewhere between
    sleep and death
    making promises,
    in good faith,
    we never
    intend to keep

    I'm tired of maintaining myself
    or maintaining the illusion
    of maintaining myself
    s'okay, though,
    can't think or feel,
    s'okay, though,
    be just fine
    always am.

    Submitted on 2005-07-31 12:50:48     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      The poem gets off to a great start with the idea that unhappiness and dissatisfaction are essential emotions that define our humanity and nothing we can do can fully end it.

    The wording of the whole piece is great and the soft rhyming makes the words easier to swallow, the often beautiful language hiding the sadness of the meaning. or maybe sadness is a beautiful thing.
    | Posted on 2005-07-31 00:00:00 | by Icarus | [ Reply to This ]
      Interesting...you think we can all relate, or is this an intraspective look.
    Whilst I think at times we can become tired and impervious to the never-ending problems of others, there is such a thing as inspiration - that small bird that flits down and plays a funny game ony six feet from you as you watch, transfixed, and decide that life is worth living after all, and things are worth caring and sharing.

    As usual, your poem leaves one extremely thoughtful,

    Be Happy

    | Posted on 2005-07-31 00:00:00 | by wewak11 | [ Reply to This ]
      How true, the failings of the mudane. You have captured well the sad truth that the world cannot bring total pleasure to that part of ourselves that craves the everything. Being detached from our true source leaves us cold and uncaring when it comes to the concerns of earthly existance. I enjoyed your insight and thought you presented your meaning well. Nice job! Diamond Dan
    | Posted on 2005-07-31 00:00:00 | by dmm | [ Reply to This ]
      i dont really understand what the poems are about im not the brightest person around but i love them just the same keep up the good work...
    | Posted on 2005-07-31 00:00:00 | by obsidiandreams | [ Reply to This ]

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