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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: I Think It Was Your Heartdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Raivn
    ASL Info:    33/f/al
    Elite Ratio:    4.28 - 1222/916/231
    Words: 188
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 708
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1109



    Description:
       This is based on the true events that transpired this past Friday morning. I love him. I think there's still something in this for him, too. If not, wouldn't he have left after the meaningless physical activity? Instead of hanging out for 3 hours and just being with me.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsI Think It Was Your Heartdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Why was it so different this time?
    It felt like you were making love to me.
    And I fell back into that place with you
    Like all this was meant to be.
    You buried your nose in my hair.
    I melted into your skin.
    You kissed me like you meant it,
    And you were gentler than you've ever been.
    You let me hold you in my arms
    And you looked into my eyes.
    We lay together on "our" bed.
    You rested your head upon my thighs.
    I find that I still fit in that crook of your arm
    Where I used to lay and listen to your heartbeat.
    I don't remember it ever beating this fast before
    And I had forgotten I could feel this heat.
    My lips keep trying to say "I love you"
    Though I know I can't say that anymore.
    But this time you made me feel something special
    Something that was there before.
    When you held me that one last time
    Before we forced our bodies to part
    It wasn't lust I saw in your eyes.
    I think it was your heart.




    Submitted on 2005-08-03 10:35:01     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This was brill and had the feel of an epic set of lyrics. In fact has given me inspiration for a song. I loved the sad little twist at the end, although it invoked sadness. One last time of holding...not on...you drag him right back right now!!!

    Kate
    xxx
    | Posted on 2006-03-07 00:00:00 | by elephantasia | [ Reply to This ]
      o [censored]! awesome aweosme awesome. this is such a sweet peice i love it! makes me think of my boyfriend. you used such good descriptions like...

    >I find that I still fit in that crook of your arm

    >It felt like you were making love to me.

    >It wasn't lust I saw in your eyes.
    I think it was your heart. (I love this! great gerat end!)
    | Posted on 2005-08-03 00:00:00 | by bestdeceptions | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh wow how sweet...
    YOu have written this in such a loving gentle way it makes me want to cry. That love you saw in him... *sigh*

    You're going on my favorites!
    | Posted on 2005-08-03 00:00:00 | by Jakirina | [ Reply to This ]
      This was a really good piece...the rhyme scheme flowed quite well and you put a lot of emotion into it. I thought you were very descriptive from the way you worded everything too...Keep Writing...
    | Posted on 2005-08-03 00:00:00 | by t0_eazy | [ Reply to This ]
      aww maybe you guys are meant to be or something! thats usually how it is isnt it? when things seem a little different in a good way. but this was really sweet of course. i really liked the end too.

    "It wasn't lust I saw in your eyes.
    I think it was your heart. "

    i thought that was probably the most powerful part there even though it was the end. but yea good job as always!

    brenna
    | Posted on 2005-08-03 00:00:00 | by Day DreaMeR | [ Reply to This ]
      Brilliant. Can't say anything other than that for this one. You used great words and fitted the lines in perfectly. Awesome piece of work. I also liked the alternate lines rhyming scheme, since I use that frequently ;)
    | Posted on 2005-08-04 00:00:00 | by Roberto Santos | [ Reply to This ]
      Awwww...haha...honestly I did that as soon as I finished reading..this was..unbelievable. Really, I love reading your stuff! God I hope this relationship works out for you...you make me want it to. Anyway...awesome job...again! ~hailie~
    | Posted on 2005-08-07 00:00:00 | by loveispain | [ Reply to This ]


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