Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: PRICILLIAdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: layDsayD
    ASL Info:    29/f/florida
    Elite Ratio:    3.16 - 264/243/147
    Words: 103
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 552
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 611



    Description:
       this was about my daughter the drs said it could never happen and then we thpught shed never make it and now she is 2 and every day i fall more in love with her


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsPRICILLIAdots
    -------------------------------------------



    In you I see my mothers eyes.
    Brilliant pools of lavender.
    Your skin is bronzed like his.
    Sun kissed.
    You have my silly curls.
    Golden beams of light .
    You are my every fear.
    You are my every hope.
    Each day I think I can not love you more.
    Every day I do .
    My angel.
    There are times I am almost finished.
    Not one more needle
    Not one more sterile bed.
    Then I see you in the rearview.
    And know god wasn’t wrong.
    It was his plan from start to finish .
    Its was for you all along .




    Submitted on 2005-08-03 12:04:32     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This is beautiful, You express you emotion so well...
    The only thing I can pcik at is in the beginning when you break off to

    Sun Kissed.

    For some reason that stick out a little too much. The break For 'My angel." Is good because it goes with the same rhythm as the peom. But the first break you can either go with out or use different wording.

    But other wise, excellent peom and I'm sorry...
    I hope she pulls through completely.
    | Posted on 2005-08-03 00:00:00 | by Jakirina | [ Reply to This ]
      This is a beautiful well written dedication piece to your daughter.
    A gift from God. How our children are so special to us. I enjoy reading pieces like this. Even though it has sadness it also have joy. Joy for you to be able to cherish your daughter. Never lose faith on what your belief is. In your heart and soul you feel the love only a mother can feel. I hope she continue to prove doctors wrong. My prayers are with her. Take care...wanda
    | Posted on 2005-08-03 00:00:00 | by bigfineq | [ Reply to This ]
      Great Job on this one...I don't have kids myself, but I can imagine it would be hell to hear someone tell you that your child may not make it..I would give my own life for any life that I created..I liked the emotion..Keep it up.
    | Posted on 2005-08-03 00:00:00 | by t0_eazy | [ Reply to This ]
      Very sweet! you are writing about loving and caring for your child which makes me feel good, you know someone on here wrote about killing there child and that is a shame, thanks for a positive poem.
    | Posted on 2005-08-05 00:00:00 | by Martin S. Allen | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    69152

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Giving written by jjd
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Incubus written by monad
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    The Promise written by annie0888
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Break Up written by WriteSomething
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    Push written by JanePlane
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    Summer written by layDsayD
    Wavelength written by saartha

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry