Chorus
I'm sitting in the moonlight
thinking bout another ghetto night
there's another gunshot
another mama crying
damn soldiers keep dying
1st verse
sitting on the porch reminenscing
on the soldiers im missing
never knew it would be this cruel
never thought id cry
never thought he'd die
damn soldiers keep dying
the pain aint caught up yet
maybe just needs another sunset
before the hood collects its debt
my mama keeps praying
i can hear what shes saying
but this is what i do!
chorus
I'm praying in the moonlight
thinking bout that fucked up night
there's that gunshot
another mama crying
damn soldiers keep dying
2nd verse
we gon ride tonight
whether its live or die
gonna leave this writing shit behind
but im tired of seeing blood on stop signs
another soldier dead without commiting a crime
but still nobody hears my rhyme
damn soldiers keep dying
we thought that boy was strong
he promised his mama he would live long
now hes in his mansion looking down
watching me sing this shit with a frown
damn soldiers keep dying
at 14 done nothing wrong
now his death is told in my song
whats wrong with that picture?
drugs and money still flow
life and death aint nothing to the ghetto
when we leave the streets
people we cherish our beats as we grow
but soldiers will keep dying
This whole piece is great, sad and sadder still is the reality of what you are saying "I'm praying in the moonlight thinking bout that [censored]ed up night there's that gunshot another mama crying damn soldiers keep dying" This was one that hit me Great write, GREAT WRITE! Lisa
This is really good. I'm not in a good comment mentality right now, but if I don't comment now, I will forget. So sorry this is crap. Awesome write though, totally serious. Wow, I sound like...I don't kow, weird. Later. Hannah
gonna leave this writing [censored] behind but im tired of seeing blood on stop signs another soldier dead without commiting a crime but still nobody hears my rhyme
i like these lines the best cuz even through all the deaths of soldiers people still wouldn't listen 2 u even though u got some relevant [censored] 2 say. good job cade
its so real. that's really all there is to say. you put it out there in a way that makes every word you say believable and truthful. i knwo the realities of living in a bad neighborhood, even tho i don't live in the kind of place i could be (section 8 like a sum [censored]). the reality is, people die everyday, we know that, but some of those people's number wasn't called at the time it was taken. real [censored] cade~P
To my mind, this poem is talking about mothers who know their sons are dealing drugs to make fast money, but are powerless to stop them..."before the hood collects it's debt, my mama keeps praying, I can hear what she's saying, but this is what I do!". Are the 'soldiers' the runners? The 'hood' the dealers? Is she asking you to stop dealing drugs, but you can't,cause of the money, and 'that is what you do' to make it? (not you personally) Was a friend who was a runner shot and killed? "reminiscing on the soldiers i'm missing" and "never thought i'd cry, never thought he'd die"? Sorry if I'm way off base here, but this is how I am relating this in my mind... Another powerful write...I like this a lot
i like this piece, expecially the last verse. i feel lke sorrow is filling the cracks in my body when i read this...its super sad! Sorry about all the [censored] in your life. idk how that helps...i wanna go back for you, if i was like...magic, id do it for you. cuz u deserve it more than i do. i mean ya ive been through some hard [censored]...but DAMN, how the hell are you survivin! lol! well keep your head up.
Who gives a crap about invalids killing eachother on the streets over drugs and other monstrosities? What about all the soldiers out there dying overseas so that you can circle jerk around from porch to porch scribbling this dribble you call poetry?
Besides, the only ghetto in Louisiana is within New Orleans where I once lived. And even that doesn't even compare to the $hit you really should be thinking about.
damn i don't know MyX was thinking..this is a great peice of Poetry. Just because there are soldiers dying over seas, but there are also some dieing over here in the ghetto life...this sounds like it could make a good song..i would enjoy hearing it one day on the radio...
I also think this is quite good and as far as MyX goes, well he likes to dish out [censored] and then get up in arms if you call him on it. I didn't care for a particular comment he made on one of my poems either and he refuses to reply to my comments now even though I have two of his poems as favorites and they were pretty good. so don't let him bother you. he just needs to grow up. any dedication to anyone who has died is worth writing and reading.
The fact that portrays everybody on the streets as invalid is complete bull[censored]. He obviously doesn'y know what the [censored] he's talking about Myx that is. I have delt my share of drugs carried guns and gone and found myself in cuffs and have had friends die on the street. It hurts so much, really. Most people don't realize until they are gone.
As far the write I did very much enjoy it. It was very up front and forward . You told the story well. I might consider putting it into my favs conidering the heart you put into it.
I really dont see what the f*ck Myx is talking about.. he needs to pull his head out of his a$$ and actually start liviing in the real world.. as for the write.. tis really really good... you know what youre talking about and you know the pain... cant ask more than the emotion you brought out... GREAT job!
Solemn-15! You have a lot going on! I hope you keep this up...(writing) I'm seeing stuff here I don'tknow if you intended, like the mansion he's looking down from. That show to me a gospel or even blues reference to heaven. In one line you personified the ghetto, saying "life and death ain't nothin TO the ghetto" ONE LINE! very nice. I certainly like how you stress the aloof, caught- up -in -it of the young men, and the helpless grief of their mothers (& grandmas, don't 4get!) We mothers are united in our hatred of street wars & institutional (country) wars. And you boys are united in growing up to be proven men. You captured this very well, Mr. Pen!
Great job. I'm really at a loss of words. You did such a fantastic job and everyone seemed to have seaid everything I did, and I really hate repeating a comment. So I'll just say well done and keep writing. You have a great talent, hold on to it.
damn i don't know MyX was thinking..this is a great peice of Poetry. Just because there are soldiers dying over seas, but there are also some dieing over here in the ghetto life...this sounds like it could make a good song..i would enjoy hearing it one day on the radio...
Submission Name: Soldiers keep Dying
