Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: please just trust medots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jermwerm
    ASL Info:    26/m/FRESNO CA
    Elite Ratio:    4.29 - 203/268/83
    Words: 126
    Class/Type: Deep Thought/
    Total Views: 992
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 632



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsplease just trust medots
    -------------------------------------------


    She likes to see me cry,
    to know my heart is broke.
    She always has to lie,
    wants me to worry and ask why?

    She loves to hurt my deepest feelings,
    she hates me as she leaves.
    She likes the fact I'm always sad,
    she makes me think she cares for me.

    She always fades my spirits,
    the hope of any love.
    She stabs me in the back,
    as angels laugh above.

    I love her so damn much,
    I'm damned for this is love.
    She hurts me every way she can,
    for her, my love will never be enough.




    Submitted on 2005-08-06 17:21:34     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      A very personal and heartfelt poem

    This poem explains perfectly the reason i have never been in love as in a relationship
    I dont think I could stand the pain

    You have overcome many obstacles and she is still there beside you
    That my friend is true love
    Take Care and if you get a chance please take a look at some of my poems and let me know what you think
    Thank You
    Ron
    | Posted on 2005-11-07 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      omg how sad...unrequited love for the lonely lover. gheesh what a way to bring down my day. so you are a fresno guy huh? i used to live in san andreas, heard of it? i loved it there...cross country oh yeah! anyways tough poem...a few spelling errors:
    quatrain III verse iii-stabes...stabs. a little typo i know. the angels laughing caught my attention...how harsh to think something so pure would laugh at something so sad. anyways im almost a fan of unrequited love poems...ever since i read the five romantic poets:
    Keats, Bryon, Shelly, Browning, and I want to say Cooleridge, but i dont know.
    anyways since ive read some of their poems on unrequited love ive become interested hoping to find some that possesses a little of thier poetic talent. anyways cool little right sad though.

    later days
    | Posted on 2005-08-06 00:00:00 | by fiery_eyes | [ Reply to This ]
      that is a tragedy when someone loves another is treated so contemptuously. when love becomes a one way street it's time to head on out. i had this type i just recently let her go. its not easy. one guy posted the statement "time to ditch the ex and move on to the next" and I did. very crushing write. if this is you, i hope you have better days. mike :)
    | Posted on 2005-08-06 00:00:00 | by inspirit999 | [ Reply to This ]
      Gee! This is a write that tells the reader how much pain you are going through. Honey, life goes on. Even though it is hard to let go...let go! Love is not suppose to hurt. Love is suppose to be shared by two. Don't think the person who is hurting you doesn't know what she is doing. She does, and guess what? She will continue because you allow her to get away with it. Pain is not an enjoyable factor. Hurt is a feeling that is hard to get over but, you can. It's not fair to allow yourself to be open over and over and over to hurt. It's not fair and it's not good. Your write is a serious one telling on your emotions. This is a good write! I hope you can go on...take care, wanda
    | Posted on 2005-08-06 00:00:00 | by bigfineq | [ Reply to This ]
      This was strong. I liked it alot. I am sorry that this woman seems to be so hateful towards you...i don't know if that is the right word, but i couldn't think of the right one at the moment. But, if you don't want to go through this pain anymore, shouldn't you just let it go...or if you love her, shouldn't you then talk to her, and figure out what or why she does not accept how much you care for her. I don't know if that should help you if you are in this situation...

    Anyways, yea, you misspelled (stabs)...and the line about the angels laughing...that seems extremely out of character for angels in heaven to do, which adds to the anger or what not in the poem. Well, this was good and i hope you to get this situation resolved.
    | Posted on 2005-08-06 00:00:00 | by Podenco del infierno | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    69565

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    Incubus written by monad
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    To written by SavedDragon
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Summer written by layDsayD
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Bond written by saartha
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    Push written by JanePlane
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Giving written by jjd
    Linger written by saartha
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry