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    dots Submission Name: Little Impaired Rhymedots

    Author: Rue
    ASL Info:    16/F/the dark side
    Elite Ratio:    4.54 - 244/182/44
    Words: 22
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Love
    Total Views: 686
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 181

       Yeah. When I'm stoned I sometimes but e's on words that don't end in e. I copied this out of my journal exactly. Ain't it cute?

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLittle Impaired Rhymedots

    Dancing with the Briars
    Mye heartse on fire
    passion blazes
    purple hazes
    freefalling in electricity
    of blue
    can't stop thinking of you.

    Submitted on 2005-08-10 00:47:23     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      hi, its cute., spelling errors?

    "Dancing with the Briars
    My hearts on fire
    passion blazes
    purple hazes
    out blue
    can't stop

    | Posted on 2005-08-10 00:00:00 | by poetotoe | [ Reply to This ]
      I like
    out of blue.

    that's really cool, I've never seen it befor.
    I do this stuff too, if you read some of my junk you can pick up that I do junk like that to or you could've tried to force some ryme so you could put, can't stop you.

    Ah well, was fun to read. Doesn't really sound like lyrics though.. could just be me?
    Seems too short for lyrics, just a small cute poem.
    | Posted on 2005-08-10 00:00:00 | by Abort_Chaotic | [ Reply to This ]
      Hey yeah it's cute but short i think it would be a great start to a song or poem why not try expanding on this i would love to hear the completed version
    Thanks for the read
    | Posted on 2005-08-10 00:00:00 | by hammyj | [ Reply to This ]
      Ah..I see I have influenced you to unleash some short ramblings like myself. Nice work. It just shows exactly how you feel when you are stoned. To expand on it would be phony
    | Posted on 2005-08-11 00:00:00 | by Ratmeat | [ Reply to This ]
      Some nice thoughts going on here, even if they were inspired by intoxication of some kind. I thought the line "purple hazes" didn't fit in as well as the rest of the piece and it distracted the mind to Hendrix, rather than the emotion you had going on here.
    peace.- james
    | Posted on 2005-08-15 00:00:00 | by JimweiZERO | [ Reply to This ]

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