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    dots Submission Name: my hauntingdots

    Author: ira
    ASL Info:    21.f.ca
    Elite Ratio:    3.22 - 238/273/176
    Words: 192
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 949
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1113

       um this just came out...cause i get this feeling sometimes that someones wiht me and i think as a kid i did too and i think i talked to whoever i thought was around me like an imagenary friend or something and it just never went away so i worte it a poem.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsmy hauntingdots

    I cant remember the last time
    I talked to you and didnít fly
    I donít remember looking into your eyes
    or ever hearing you cry
    I donít recall your name
    and vaguely I remember your face.
    But I remember your voice
    every word you ever spoke.
    I donít know who you are
    or why I want to know.
    I just know your part of me
    embedded in my soul.
    And now I stand in front of you
    but only in a dream.
    I thought you once the wind
    but your still haunting me
    I feel you vaguely
    all around
    and tonight I feel your frown
    that Iím scared
    of your being
    that I fear and your not revealing
    who you are or where.
    And I can feel you beside me
    as I write these words
    your not a ghost
    your not a spirit
    your much alive and I fear it.
    Not knowing why
    but I do
    the words you spoke to me have always been true
    but I donít remember
    no I cant recall
    who you are
    or where you first came from.

    Submitted on 2005-08-11 01:20:45     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
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    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Like the others said there is some mystery in it and oh how we humans and such adore our mystery! My favorite part is "And I can feel you beside me
    as I write these words
    your not a ghost
    your not a spirit
    your much alive and I fear it." It seems as if these words, perhaps the whole work, come from a spirit as well. Wouldn't that be a twist?
    I get fear from this (not the twist) and also some feeling of anticipation...but the last part may have been unsaid. And see? Others say you do rhyme well.
    | Posted on 2005-08-16 00:00:00 | by thesinoftaima | [ Reply to This ]
      You used the word vaguely two and both added to the fact of the unkown around you nicly written. also the presence of this being is clear and mysterious they way you wrote it, nice write.

    | Posted on 2005-08-11 00:00:00 | by lone_one | [ Reply to This ]
      There is a lot of mystery you have projected in this Poem .It kind of got me to finish the entire poem , because it hrld my interest right till the end .The mystery element ofcourse will keep the reader engrossed.
    you seem to have got that here.
    | Posted on 2005-08-11 00:00:00 | by Sophia | [ Reply to This ]
      I really enjoyed reading this,it rymed it well and it really gripped me right from the start with the mystery of it,and it kept me reading right to the end with intrest and not just to finnish readin it.
    | Posted on 2005-08-11 00:00:00 | by korn9426 | [ Reply to This ]

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